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theforgottenmcrmy · 2 years ago

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Storms (Ser Harwin Strong x Reader)

᯽ Part 1 of this story, “Safety”, can be read HERE.᯽

᯽ Part 2 of this story, “Captivated”, can be read HERE.᯽

Pairing: Ser Harwin Strong x Tyrell! Female Reader

Warnings: GOT typical sexism, canon divergence, violence, references to a sick parent, death of minor characters.

Word Count: 7,800 ish.

Summary: A royal wedding should be a joyous occasion for the realm- but there’s something ominous in the air. Dark clouds linger over the royal family, and the rest of Westeros. Even you may not be able to make it through what lies ahead unscathed... Fortunately, you’ve found someone who you know you can count on to always be by your side.

A/N: Y’all... I’m still shooketh over here.🥲🖤 I really appreciate all the support so very much. I’ll keep writing for this as long as I have ideas and as long as there’s a want for it. If anyone is interested, I highly recommend listening to The Green Dress score while reading the second half- it’s what I did while writing it. The score is just *chef’s kiss* and sets the tone for the whole feast so well. I hope you all enjoy, and please feel free to let me know what you think!

PS, before you come after me because of the little time jump, I politely ask that you keep reading... I didn’t skip over *the scene*, I promise!😂

The winds of change had come to blow through Westeros.

Princess Rhaenyra’s tour of the Seven Kingdoms in search of a future King Consort had abruptly come to an end. Though the death of one of the suitors during Lord Boremond’s host at Storm’s End would have put a tainted mark on the remainder of her tours to come, the Princess had declared the tour over herself shortly thereafter… Despite the two months of traveling that remained.

Prince Daemon had finally returned from his war in the Stepstones, and presented King Viserys with the crown he had been bestowed upon him following his victory. The two Targaryen brothers reunited in a touching scene witnessed by most of the Court. He was welcomed at Court once more… until one day, he wasn’t.

Following an incident that you did not know the entire truth of, though you wouldn’t have spoken of it if you did know, the King had exiled him again. You could tell Princess Rhaenyra grieved the absence of her uncle once more, but then Ser Criston Cole had been suddenly much more attentive to her…

King Viserys had dismissed Lord Otto Hightower from his duties as Hand of the King, an event that had not only generated a large amount of whispers among the Reach, but among the other kingdoms as well. The King had appointed Lord Lyonel Strong in his stead.

Following Princess Rhaenyra’s denouncement of the tour, King Viserys had arranged the marriage for her with Ser Laenor Velaryon. Like a few others at Court, you had heard rumors of her cousin’s… preferences, and were worried, though it was not your place to offer up your opinion on. Eventually, she noticed your reservations, and had subtly, but full-heartedly, assured you that she and Ser Laenor had reached an arrangement. Besides, King Viserys’ mind was made up, and Princess Rhaenyra did not try to change it. Despite your initial hesitation, you shared the opinion of King Viserys- the match was a good one. Uniting the two branches of the Targaryen House and healing old wounds could only bode well for the dynasty.

From then on, you threw yourself into your work even more, supporting Princess Rhaenyra in any way you could with the royal wedding preparations. It kept you very busy, but you were grateful for something else to focus on.

After many weeks of planning and preparation, the week of the royal wedding celebration had finally arrived.

You and Princess Rhaenyra stood on a balcony amongst the far end of the palace gardens, looking over Blackwater Bay in the distance. Though Ser Criston Cole may have accompanied you previously, he had not chosen to this time. He’d been standoffish lately, and regarded Princess Rhaenyra with much more formality than you were used to seeing him display. Something had happened between them, you deduced… but, much like the circumstances that led to the sudden exile of Prince Daemon, you knew better than to ask unless the Princess spoke of it first.

Both of you watched in comfortable silence as ships, almost all of them bearing the Velaryon coat of arms, sailed toward King’s Landing. The vessels spanned as far back and across the water as your eyes could see. The fleet appeared to be moving slowly- but you knew that to be a fallacy. In what would be no time at all, the Princess’ betrothed, his family, most of their household, and various bannermen and members of the guard would make land.

An odd whistling noise ran out from the sky. You tilted your head upwards, as did Princess Rhaenyra, and three large, majestic beasts broke through the clouds up above. The three dragons and their riders flew downwards, their wings skimming the water between ships before flying up ahead.

Princess Rhaenyra pointed to one, then another, and finally, the third. “There’s Seasmoke… Meleys… and of course, Vhagar.”

More whistling could be heard as the dragons flew over the castle, rustling the trees and shrubbery around you with the wind. They descended from the sky before finally disappearing from view- presumably landing in the periphery of the Dragon Pit.

Dragons were fascinating creatures, but they were still terrifying. Unlike many others throughout the Seven Kingdoms, you were glad not to have been born a Targaryen… No one had ever heard of someone being burned or eaten alive by roses.

You would have been content to stay there and watch the incoming ships sail into the bay with the Princess until the sun set, but you knew you both had duties to attend to elsewhere. You looked over at her with an apologetic look.

“We should return to your chambers soon, Your Grace. The earlier you are dressed and ready, the better.”

It went without saying that Princess Rhaenyra being late to the welcome feast would simply be unacceptable.

“We will, shortly,” she promised distractedly, her focus having returned to the bay.

You felt sympathy for her. You had a feeling that, would it have been possible, Princess Rhaenyra would have had heirs for her line whilst forgoing marriage altogether. Alas, not even the Targaryens were that magical, and a King Consort would be needed for some things.

“Princess Rhaenyra… Lady Y/N.”

The pair of you turned around to face the third party who had joined you.

“Ser Harwin!” Princess Rhaenyra gleamed, before looking at you with a mischievous glint in her eyes. “To what do we owe the pleasure, My Lord?”

Ser Harwin smiled patiently. “A messenger informed me that you had requested my presence, Your Grace.”

“Did I?” Princess Rhaenyra feigned, looking at you with mock confusion. “Well, I simply cannot recall why I may have done that… My sincerest apologies, Ser Harwin.”

“No apologies needed, Your Grace,” Ser Harwin assured her cordially.

His eyes drifted calmly over to you. In a flash, you caught a wink he sent in your direction, causing your eyes to fall to the dirt path beneath you.

“Well,” Princess Rhaenyra said then, taking a few steps away from the balcony and back into gardens. “You are absolutely correct, Lady Y/N- I should return to my chambers and get ready for the feast at once.”

“Would you like me to go with you, Your Princess?” you asked her, though you already knew her answer.

Princess Rhaenyra came to a stop beside Ser Harwin and vaguely waved you off over her shoulder. “No, no, no. Take your time. The girls will assist me until you arrive.”

Ser Harwin looked amused.

“As you wish, Your Grace,” you called to her, smirking.

“Princess,” Ser Harwin nodded her respectfully as she proceeded to walk away and head back towards the Red Keep.

Such had been a little “game” of hers as of late. The Princess seemed to take far too much amusement out of summoning the knight nicknamed Breakbones, finding a convenient reason to excuse herself, and leaving the two of you alone. Though her game had the potential to create quite the scandal for the pair of you, should you be spotted together in a compromising scene without any escort, you knew without a doubt that Princess Rhaenyra meant no harm. In fact, you were rather grateful for her meddling ways.

Once the Princess was out of earshot, Ser Harwin took a step forward, closing the distance between you. He nodded to you in greeting, but when he spoke this time, his tone was far more tender than it had been just a few moments before.

“My Love.”

You tilted your head upwards to look at him better. The mere sight of him caused you to smile so widely that it felt as though your face might go numb from the joy you were trying to contain. “Dearest.”

Of all the changes that had been occurring in Westeros, none had bore more of an impact on or immersed as much as your newfound courtship with Ser Harwin Strong.

“You look breathtaking today, as usual.”

Your cheeks burned. “Thank you, My Lord.”

You still weren’t used to Ser Harwin’s praises, but part of you hoped you never would be. The fluttering you felt in your stomach upon hearing the sweet words reminded you just how much you cared for the man in front of you.

You attempted to joke, “If you think of me as beautiful now, you should see me in the gown I am to wear to the feast.”

Ser Harwin happily took the bait. “I assure you, I have been counting down the hours until my eyes are blessed with the sight.”

You bit the inside of your cheek to keep yourself from smiling any wider. You took a moment to glance around you, ensuring that the two of you were alone. Once you were confident that you would not be heard, or overseen, you took another step closer towards the man that held your heart, extending your hands outwards to him as you did so.

Ser Harwin took his hands in your own hands with practiced ease. His hands were calloused from years of training and fighting, but you wouldn’t have changed that. The feel of your intertwined hands was grounding… and you needed to be grounded whenever you spoke with him lately, as his words tended to leave you bogged in an enamored daze.

His eyes, which looked upon you with nothing but the utmost care, tended to cloud your mind terribly, too.

“You look particularly happy today,” you noted, an unspoken question lingering in your tone.

“Seeing My Lady does tend to uplift my spirits,” Ser Harwin admitted playfully, his thumbs running lightly over the back of your hands.

You gave him an equally playful stern look. “My Lord,” you chided, laughing once. “You are a charmer, I will grant you that… But you know that is not what I meant.”

Ser Harwin gently raised one of your hands to his lips, placing a gentle kiss upon it. The action would normally have caused you to nearly swoon, but you pushed onwards, desperate for an answer to your question.

“Harwin,” you plead, lowering your voice as you addressed him informally, in the hope that it might cause him to focus. It worked- something shifted within his eyes, and suddenly, he looked more alert, more attentive.

“Please tell me,” you asked of him, “Has there been any news?”

The news which you sought was that of your impending betrothal.

Much had happened in both of your personal lives since Derron Tyrell’s visit to King’s Landing some time ago. Ser Harwin Strong’s letter that he’d written to your father had compelled your brother to travel to discuss the matter with him, and his father, Lord Lyonel, in person. Upon his arrival, your brother’s first inquiry in the matter was as to whether a betrothal to Ser Harwin was something you truly desired.

The Strongs were a noble family, and Harrenhal was the largest castle in all of Westeros, despite the ghastly tales. It was also worth mentioning that Harwin was now son to the newly appointed Hand of the King. But you were the only daughter of Lord Larris Tyrell, Defender of the Marshes, Lord Paramount of the Reach, Warden of the South… and all those other titles. You were from the Great House of the Reach, and Ser Harwin, while the oldest son and heir, was of a smaller noble house from the Riverlands. Not to mention that the Hand of the King was not a position that guaranteed any permanency.

Your father and brother had long since decided that they would choose a suitor for you, but they had also made no promises about denying you a suitor who they deemed as unworthy. They both wanted reassurance that this marriage would bring you true happiness, and not one arranged merely because Ser Harwin Strong had been the first to make an offer. After all, there were more advantageous matches for you that could be made… and there had been a mention of a certain Lannister or two.

You attempted to tell your brother about how your attachment to Ser Harwin, and his to you, had developed. You hoped it might explain why Ser Harwin had been compelled to write such a letter.

“Am I to understand this is a love match, then?” your brother had asked then, hopefully.

It most certainly was.

You could still recall the scene in your mind…

…

Your heart pounded in your chest. You had sent word through a personal messenger, one whom the Princess used frequently for her own devices when subtlety and discretion was of the utmost importance.

Ser Harwin must have gotten your message, as he was already waiting for you out in the castle gardens, in the exact secluded spot where you had requested to meet with him.

“Lady Y/N… I heard the Red Keep welcomed a visitor from the Reach today,” he jested, visibly nervous once more, just as he had been when you had spoken with him last. “Perhaps they are an acquaintance of yours?”

You wordlessly withdrew the letter, which you had clutched tightly in your fist, and presented it to him. “This letter… This letter that you wrote to my father. What does this mean?”

“Have you read it?” he asked, eyeing the parchment with an emotion you couldn’t quite place.

“Please,” you begged. “I have spent the better part of my memory believing that you were taken with and about to be betrothed to another. My heart simply cannot take any more jests or delays at its expense… Speak plainly, My Lord. What does this letter mean?”

Upon the seriousness of your tone, which was a far cry from your usual playful banter and jovial attitudes the two of you had exchanged, Ser Harwin fell quiet, and his nerves immediately dissipated. You heard his jaw close, and for a moment, as he looked down at you with gravity in his eyes and upon his face, you feared he might not speak at all.

When he did, he spoke in a very calm voice.

“I can make my intentions very plain to you, My Lady,” he vowed. “If you will grant me permission to do so.”

Your brows furrowed in confusion, and you were slightly off put by his choice of phrasing. “Of course, but-”

Ser Harwin silenced you by leaning down and capturing your lips with his own.

You froze, unsure of how to react to the foreign gesture. Before your brain or heart could fight for control of your next move, Ser Harwin withdrew from you, leaving you stunned, and, to your mild embarrassment, gawking up at him.

“You have captivated me, and stolen my heart right out from my chest. I know I have wronged you by not admitting this truth to you first, as I had intended. As punishment, know that my heart is yours to do with as you see fit… Though I would dare to beg you for mercy, Y/N. If you feel the same for me as I do for you, I ask that you grant me an honor which I most likely do not deserve, but will strive everyday for the rest of my life to be worthy of… I ask that you pledge yourself to me, and become my wife.”

…

How could the truth have been right in front of your eyes for so long, and yet you had mistaken it for something else entirely?! It was a folly you would not soon let yourself live down, that much was for certain.

“And, should you not feel the same,” Ser Harwin continued, noting your silence, “and I have now wronged you in more ways than one, you need only say so. I shall leave you at once, and without a word. We shall never speak of this aga-”

With a newfound sense of courage you did not know you possessed, you stood up on your toes, and kissed the man you loved right back.

It was Ser Harwin’s turn to be silenced.

There was no telling how long the pair of you stayed out that night, tucked away from the rest of the Red Keep and all of King’s Landing, just enjoying being in the presence of each other. But there was one more moment you recall definitively.

“I love you.”

“And I love you.”

“Also, my answer is yes.”

“I… hoped as much, My Lady.”

…

You almost let out a wistful sigh. The memory of that night was still clearly visible in your mind’s eye, just as clear as Harwin was now, standing before you.

Had you both been commoners, you would have already been wed. Ser Harwin had admitted as much, and you agreed. But as both of your families were of the nobility, the two of you were forced to wait as your fathers negotiated the finer details of the exchange instead.

After your brother had learned the truth of your feelings, and after having a private conversation with Ser Harwin shortly after, Derron met with Lord Lyonel to begin the discussions. But, as your father was to be made privy to every detail, the negotiations had not been complete by the time your brother was due to return to Highgarden.

Lord Lyonel Strong had presented your brother with the details of his most recent offer, and shortly after, you returned to Highgarden with your brother to see your father. You were glad to visit him, and to learn that his health had improved from what you had last heard and feared. Your father was happy to see you too- not only as a faithful and dutiful servant to Princess Rhaenyra, but also as a woman who was soon to be wed to her love, an honorable knight who was more than capable of providing for and protecting her.

Your father reviewed the offer made by Lord Lyonel, and wrote his own counteroffer. You presented it to Lord Lyonel upon your return to King’s Landing, and the waiting began. Since then, for a long few weeks, ravens flew from King’s Landing to Highgarden and back, many, many times, as the negotiations continued.

The issue of your dowry proved to be a significant hurdle. At first, Your father couldn’t help but be a little suspicious of the Strongs’ motives with the proposed alliance. Throughout all the Seven Kingdoms, the Tyrells were second in wealth only to the Lannisters. You knew that acquiring wealth was the last thing on Ser Harwin’s mind when confessed his feelings to you, and he’d said as much several times since. But eventually, a dowry amount was settled upon that was found to be acceptable for both families. There was an additional stipulation- all of the funds were to go towards repairs to Harrenhal and its surrounding grounds. The hope was that doing so would make the castle safer for you and your husband… and eventually, your children.

Since then, the negotiation points had been of little concern to either of you: where the wedding would take place, who would pay for what parts of the celebration, where you would spend parts of the year, and what surname your children would have. It was all trifling. Both you and Ser Harwin just wanted the negotiations to conclude, and the sooner, the better.

“Unfortunately, I have no news for you today, My Lady,” he informed you, his thumbs still tracing lightly over the backs of your hands. His gaze lifted from your intertwined hands, and he looked deeply into your eyes. “But my father assures me that they are close to reaching a final agreement.”

You didn’t have the heart to point out to him that he had already been telling you that for quite some time. “Let us hope.”

Ser Harwin looked about your surroundings briefly, confirming that you were still alone. In consolation to your disappointment, he leant downwards, and placed a soft kiss upon your forehead.

Despite your frustrations, and his own, it could always be said that Harwin never hesitated to do whatever he could to reassure you that the match between you was one worth waiting for.

“You look beautiful, Your Grace.”

Princess Rhaenyra turned her head over her shoulder and smiled at you as you entered her chambers. Two ladies- who happened to be none other than Ser Harwin’s younger sisters- attended to her. One smoothed out the skirts of her dress while the other was putting some adornments in her silver hair.

After their father had been appointed Hand of the King, the two girls had only recently been chosen by the Princess to serve as her junior ladies in waiting. They were a few years younger than you and the Princess, but old enough to have some scrutiny and tact about them, and they were eager to please. Both were already dressed and prepared for the welcome feast.

You looked over the Princess’ appearance with mock scrutiny, but ultimately smiled. “The two of you did such an excellent job… I fear I shall no longer be of service soon.”

Princess Rhaenyra rolled her eyes playfully. “Come now, Lady Y/N- how ever would I get on without you?” One of the girls presented her with a hand mirror. The Princess looked over her appearance for a moment before giving a small nod. “This will do. Thank you very much, My Ladies.”

The girls smiled, giddy with her praise.

“You two should head on over to the throne room,” Princess Rhaenyra dismissed them. “I’ll have Lady Y/N attend to whatever is left.”

The girls nodded in understanding, curtsied, and promptly left the Princess’ chambers.

Princess Rhaenyra picked up the small mirror again, and apprised her appearance once more. You caught a glimpse of her face in the reflection from your place a few feet away, and it was with a twinge of sadness that you realized how downtrodden she looked.

“Are you well, Your Grace?” you asked her quietly, subtly offering her an opportunity to speak about whatever was on her mind.

Unfortunately, the Princess did not wish to speak of whatever was troubling her. She put the mirror down and turned to face you. “Yes, all is well,” she answered, though her tone still left you questioning the sincerity of her words. She smiled at you teasingly, and inquired, “Is everything alright with you, Lady Y/N?”

You pursed your lips, fighting off a smile.

“Has there been any news?” the Princess asked, eargerly and expectantly.

Though you still were in her service, Princess Rhaenyra had become a true friend and confidant of yours. She was knowledgeable of the negotiations stalling your marriage to Ser Harwin, and was sympathetic for you.

“Not yet,” you answered, unable to disguise the disappointment in your voice.

“I am sorry to hear that… But the night is still young,” Princess Rhaenyra noted optimistically. “I bet that by the end of the week, another betrothal announcement shall be made.”

You certainly hoped so, but didn’t want to get your hopes up.

“You should get ready for the feast,” she said then, giving you something else to focus on. “The seamstress put the finishing touches I asked for upon your dress, and left it over there.”

You walked over to the bed, where Princess Rhaenyra had gestured to. Your eyes immediately spotted the gown in question. The Princess had requested that all her ladies wore similar gowns, all of the same color, for the welcome feast. Your gown was a little bit more… revealing, than what the Strong ladies had been given, but it was more suitable for each of your ages that way.

“The color matches the jewels in your hair,” you observed with a smile.

Princess Rhaenyra returned the smile, pleased that you found the gown as gorgeous as she did.

The welcome feast had begun.

The esteemed guests from all across Westeros who had traveled to King’s Landing for the festivities were announced one by one, before paying their respects to the King and Princess.

The Queen had yet to arrive.

You were the only representative of House Tyrell to attend, and conveyed your apologies to King Viserys on your family’s behalf. Your father had taken ill once more- another factor that had played a role in the pace at which the marriage negotiations were taking place- and your brother Derron had no choice but to stay in Highgarden to help him manage affairs.

Since you were alone, you had no one immediately obvious with which to sit for the meal. Your betrothal to Ser Harwin was not yet official, so you had been assigned a seat beside the Hightowers and other noble families of other houses from the Reach. You knew most of them well enough to be able to carry out polite conversation, to accept well wishes for your father, and to inquire as to the state of their own houses and health.

But you couldn’t help it as your eyes drifted forlornly down towards the opposite end of the table, where Ser Harwin was seated with the majority of his family. You caught his eye every now and then, and when you did, the two of you played an unspoken game to see which would be the first to break and look away.

House Velaryon was the last to enter the throne room, and the attention of everyone else in the room was commanded by the sight. As House Velaryon strode over to the high table, which was positioned just in front of the Iron Throne, thunderous applause rang out. Though Lord Coryls had been no stranger to the Court during King Viserys’ reign, his wife, the Princess Rhaenys, and their children were not so often seen. Everyone was eager to lay eyes upon the future King Consort, Ser Laenor, and his sister, Lady Laena.

The princess rose from her seat to greet her betrothed, and shortly thereafter, the Velaryons and the rest of their household were seated. Everyone else in the room followed suit, save the King, who looked over the crowd. You looked over towards King Viserys and waited for his speech to begin.

But suddenly, the King’s cheerful face fell, and muffled whisperings around you filled your ears. You followed the King’s appalled look over to the entryway, where none other than Prince Daemon was making his way into the throne room. Ser Harrold did not bother to announce him- he was probably as shocked as most everyone else in the room.

The whispers did not cease as Daemon approached the high table calmly, acting as though he had not been exiled by the King, again, not too long ago.

You looked over at Rhaenyra and tried to gauge her reaction to the uninvited guest. If she had known about her uncle’s impending return for the wedding, she had not told you of it- though you honestly could not say whether she would have. The pair of you had a special bond, but the bond between her and Prince Daemon would always be stronger.

Thankfully, the Princess looked just as surprised to see her uncle as everyone else, though she was much better at concealing her facial reaction than the King. Once Daemon was before the high table, you thought King Viserys might call for his head right then and there. But instead, after a moment of thought, he beckoned for a chair to be brought out for him. Prince Daemon was seated beside the Hand, Lord Lyonel, and the room began to settle from the interruption.

King Viserys smiled once more, though it was more strained than genuine, and began his welcoming speech. Unfortunately, he was not able to get very far into it, before it was disrupted once more.

All eyes in the room once again turned towards the entryway. Unlike with the previous tardy guest, no whispers erupted this time. Instead, the room was overcome with a bone-chilling silence.

Queen Alicent had finally arrived. But what was more shocking than her blatant disrespect of King Viserys was the outfit she had chosen instead.

She wore a bright, emerald green gown.

Those seated rose respectfully as she made her way over to the high table. Despite those who you were seated with- other members of House Hightower being seated just a few seats down from you- your eyes involuntarily narrowed as the Queen passed you. Just what point was she trying to get across with her choice of garment?

You’d never seen the sight with your own eyes before, only having read about it in books and having heard it in tales from your father. But you knew, very well, what color the beacon in Oldtown glowed when the Hightowers called their banners to war.

Green.

Once the Queen was seated, the King was finally able to finish his speech, and dinner was served. You still snuck glances at Ser Harwin as often as you dared, though the looks you gave him now were probably laced with little else but concern.

Once the meal was over, you were grateful for the dancing to begin, for it gave you a perfect excuse to stand and socialize with other guests whom you were not immediately seated by. Princess Rhaenyra and Ser Laenor were the first to take the floor, as was the tradition, but once the dance was complete, the other guests slowly but surely joined in the fun.

You rose from your seat and walked over towards the end of the table, joining the group of nobles who had gathered there to observe those already on the dancefloor.

“Lady Y/N.”

You turned, and were pleasantly surprised to find Lord Lyonel Strong standing beside you.

“My Lord,” you greeted him with a smile.

“Are you enjoying the feast so far, My Lady?” he inquired then.

The question was innocent enough, but difficult to answer truthfully. Your eyes darted over to Queen Alicent, and then Prince Daemon, who were both still seated. Well aware of the fact that you could be overheard, you simply answered, “This feast will be remembered for quite some time to come, I am sure.”

“I do not disagree,” Lord Lyonel said knowingly, having noted whom you had glanced at. Lord Lyonel, on the surface, gave the air of an uncomplicated man. But you were beginning to suspect that there was more to him than one might assume. A lord from a small noble house in the Riverlands didn’t become appointed Hand of the King by mere chance.

“Lady Y/N,” he said then, in a much quieter tone that grabbed your attention immediately, as was its purpose. “I do want to thank you for your patience as this business with Highgarden is negotiated.”

Lord Lyonel’s statement was decently vague, but you knew immediately what he was referring to. “Thank you, My Lord. I understand that such matters are necessary, though I would deny that it has not begun to feel tedious at times.”

Lord Lyonel gave you a sympathetic smile. “Perhaps you are right. Even so, I will be glad once everything has been settled. I must admit, I was, and still am, pleased by the proposition. I think all parties involved stand to benefit greatly… specifically, my son. I am grateful that House Tyrell has considered him to be a worthy business partner.”

He approved of the match; that the subtext of his cordial words. But even more so, Lord Lyonel was pleased that the match contributed greatly to the happiness of his son.

“There is more to Ser Harwin than his nickname,” you said decisively. “I believe Lord Tyrell and my brother simply needed some guidance in order to see that.”

Lord Lyonel nodded courteously.

As if he had known he was the topic of your very conversation, Ser Harwin made his way through the onlookers. He came to a stop before the two of you, and nodded to Lord Lyonel in greeting. “Father.”

Then he turned to you. He looked remarkable, dressed in finer clothes than what he typically donned, and a significant section of his hair had been pulled up and tied back, revealing the handsome features of his face. You were so lost in the sight of him, you almost didn’t register that he had spoken to you.

“Lady Y/N,” he greeted, giving you a charming smile. Said smile was offered to many, but it never was accompanied with the twinkle in his eyes that shone now. That had become exclusively reserved for you, a thought that both made you feel humble and filled you with pride. “I think it to be an insult that you have not been asked to dance thus far. Could you find it in your heart to grant me the honor?”

You looked towards his outstretched hand, and attempted to minimize the love-sick expression you undoubtedly wore. “It would be my pleasure, Ser Harwin.”

With one last glance at Lord Lyonel, you took Ser Harwin’s hand and allowed him to escort you to the dance floor.

You seldom had the opportunity to spend such time with Ser Harwin in public, and you reveled in every minute of it. The incredible ease you felt with him, whether it was while dancing, talking, or simply being in the presence of each other, was one that had yet to be matched.

As the pair of you went on about the dance, turning and spinning and stepping about as the song dictated, you conversed quietly.

“You truly are a vision tonight,” Ser Harwin complemented, causing your cheeks to burn both with mild embarrassment and in pain from your amused smile. “Better than I even dared to dream of.”

“Thank you, My Lord. … But now, I wonder- do you dream of me often, Ser Harwin?” you jested, taking his hand and twirling once.

Once you had turned around, you nearly came face to face with his broad chest; the two of you were suddenly much closer than before.

“Since you asked,” Ser Harwin said, leaning down so as to speak directly into your ear, “There are few nights that you do not haunt my dreams, My Lady.”

Before anyone could notice the inappropriate distance between yourselves, you each took a step back, and continued the dance smoothly.

You were taken aback, but pleasantly so. “Haunt?” you echoed. “Am I a ghost, plaguing you with nightmares?”

“I assure you,” he said, suavely stepping beside and turning to you in time with the music, “Not all ghosts are bad. Nor could any sight of you gracing my mind whilst I am asleep ever be considered a nightmare.”

Before you could think of something charming or witty to respond with, you noticed someone making their way onto the dance floor. It was with dread that they were headed directly towards you.

“I fear our time together is about to be cut short,” Ser Harwin announced, also making note of it.

You forced a smile as you greeted the interrupter of your lovely moment. “Lord Loreon.”

Loreon Lannister merely nodded cooly to Ser Harwin in his own way of greeting. The gesture made you want to give him a verbal lashing for his impoliteness, but since you were surrounded by others, and it was not yet socially acceptable for you and Ser Harwin to show any sort of attachment to the other, you were limited.

Ser Harwin knew just as much, too. He politely refused to acknowledge the disrespect, and greeted the other man anyways. “My Lord.”

“Might I cut in?”

Ser Harwin had no choice but to allow Lord Loreon to do so, and he knew that. The little weasel.

“I hope you enjoy the rest of the feast, Lady Y/N,” Ser Harwin said to you.

“And I you, My Lord.”

You watched with mild sadness as your love wandered off the dance floor before disappearing amongst the crowd of nobles watching on the outskirts.

A new song began, and you forced your feet to move, engaging in a dance once more.

Lord Loeron, though a few years your junior, had grown into a man since you had last seen him. However, he was still a young one at that, and you had your suspicions that the passing years made him no more wise. The boy- young man- had always lacked some tact. You’d hoped his father, Lord Jason Lannister, had instilled some sense in him, as Loreon was his only son and heir. But from what Princess Rhaenyra had shared with you regarding Lord Lannister’s own behavior and choice comments as of late, you severely doubted it.

“You’ve grown since I last saw you, My Lord.”

“Perhaps,” Lord Loreon granted. “Though I am afraid that I am nowhere near the size of Breakbones.”

You frowned in displeasure at his insinuating comment.

Your courtship with Ser Harwin while your fathers worked out the details of your marriage was not exactly a secret. But, other than Lord Jason on the occasion, Lannisters had been sparse at Court as of late… You concluded that the walls must have had ears. You only hoped that they did not have eyes as well.

“I am surprised by your choice of gown, Lady Y/N- I thought you might wear green, as it is a color of your House.”

And also the color with which Queen Alicent had chosen to draw a metaphorical line in the struggle for power.

You answered, “Princess Rhaenyra deemed it fit that all her ladies should wear gowns of Targaryen red tonight.”

“A wise decision by the Princess,” Lord Loreon declared. “I’m sure you look just as lovely in gold, as it is the other of your House’s colors... Though, perhaps a gown of red and gold would suit you best?”

You paused briefly, before forcing yourself to continue the steps. You feigned, “I’m afraid I do not understand what you mean, My Lord.”

“No, I suppose you do not. Perhaps my father shall arrange to meet with yours, and they can sort it out for the two of us. We would not dare spend any longer than necessary on negotiations. We know how much a marriage to the daughter of Lord Tyrell is worth, just as I am sure you know how valuable the marriage to the son of Lord Lannister is.”

You let out a small sigh, your patience for pleasantries completely diminished by his goading words. “If that is your way of proposing marriage, My Lord, it seems there is still vast room for improvement to be had in ways of your eloquence and common sense.”

Lord Loreon narrowed his eyes at you, but did not cease his dancing. In a threateningly low tone, he demanded, “You dare insult me?”

As suspected, time had not made him more wise. Lord Loreon’s pride was wounded just as easily as it always had been.

“It is I that has been insulted, My Lord. Asking for my hand so crudely, and during the wedding feast for the future Queen, no less?” you countered swiftly. “I think my father would be most displeased with House Lannister if he heard of this, not to mention the King.”

Lord Loreon finally stopped partaking in the dance. He looked very cross. He opened his mouth to retort, but was cut off by several loud, piercing screams.

Immediately, the dance floor descended into a state of chaos. Initially, you were shoved backwards, as some sort of altercation took place in the middle of the dance floor. You could not see the individuals throwing fists, but you heard the sickening thuds of their punches landing mercilessly upon the other, despite the commotion of the crowd.

You looked back over towards Lord Loreon, only to discover that he had taken the moment of distraction to abandon you. However, you had expected no less of him.

Suddenly, the tune of the crowd changed. Encouraging shouts as the brawlers went after one another turned into horrified screaming. Guards flooded the room and attempted to make their way towards the middle of the crowd.

As the crowd shifted with the movement, you were unceremoniously shoved backwards and down onto the ground. The legs of others nearby as they shuffled backwards and out of the way were encroaching upon you rapidly.

Despite your position, you heard Princess Rhaenyra cry out, “Laenor!”

A horrible thought struck you. The Princess had been on the dance floor as well- you had seen her not but a few moments before. Was she still entangled somewhere in all of this mess? You had to help her.

You tucked your chin, and used the chair you had fallen up against as leverage to hoist yourself up and off the ground. Your eyes searched the crowd, and you felt dismayed when the Princess was not immediately in sight. “Princess?!”

Before you could decide on your next move of action, someone promptly picked you up, and threw you over their shoulder.

In the midst of everything going on, you were unable to get a good look at your sudden captor. You shouted protests and fought back, kicking and punching the man who had decided to take advantage of the situation as he proceeded to push his way through the crowd and away from the dance floor.

“Y/N,” a very familiar voice huffed, before gently placing you back on your own two feet.

It was Ser Harwin.

He hadn’t been your captor, no- but rather, your savior.

You watched in a stunned silence as Ser Harwin quickly looked you over with concern, putting his hands on your shoulders to get your attention. “Are you alright?” he demanded, gently but urgently. “Are you hurt?”

“No, no,” you replied quickly. “I’m fine.”

He’d placed you near the high table, where his father, and the rest of the royal family, even Queen Alicent, looked onwards towards the fight that the guards were still attempting to break up.

“Where’s Rhaenyra?” you heard the King ask, his increasing worry audibly evident.

“The Princess!” you said, suddenly recalling what you had set out to do before Ser Harwin had whisked you away- find Princess Rhaenyra, and make sure she was alright. You looked up at him pleadingly, before gesturing over from whence you both had just come. The Princess was still nowhere to be seen. “I heard her, right over there!”

Ser Harwin looked from where you had gestured and up towards his father. Lord Lyonel, also looking concerned, nodded over to the chaos as a silent go-ahead.

Ser Harwin fought his way back into and through the crowd, and you watched with bated breath as he did so. As much as you were concerned for the Princess’ safety as the seconds passed, so were you worried for him, as he quite literally punched and pushed his way through the half rioting and half panicking crowd.

Some ways away, he bent down and disappeared beneath your line of sight. Just as quickly, he stood once more, with Princess Rhaenyra over the top of his shoulder, as he had done to you. He couldn’t make his way back through the crowd quick enough.

Ser Harwin deposited Princess Rhaenyra down on the ground beside you, and you fussed over her immediately.

“Your Grace!” you exclaimed worriedly. “Are you hurt?”

Thankfully, Princess Rhaenyra looked more upset than physically injured. “I’m fine, I’m fine… What in Seven Hells is going on?!”

“Rhaenyra!” Her father beckoned her over to him, and she did not hesitate to heed him. With one last glance at you, she thanked Ser Harwin before joining the King.

The shouting silenced abruptly, drawing your attention back to the fight.

The crowd parted down the middle, revealing a gruesome scene. Ser Criston Cole was laying fatal blows upon another man, who laid practically motionless beneath him. You could not recognize the man from here, but you recognized the colors he wore as someone who was likely to have attended the feast with House Velaryon. The crowd stepped back further still, forced to do so by the guards who had finally managed to intervene. Then, the room went still.

Ser Criston, bloodied, and with a look upon his face that had been numbed with pure rage, halted his blows.

The man beneath him was dead.

Like wildfire, the crowd dispersed, fleeing the throne room. Nothing good would come of this- at the very least, the feast would not be able to continue. A member of the Kingsguard had just punched a man to death!

“Go, you two,” you heard the light but commanding voice of Lord Lyonel from behind you. To Harwin, he added, “See to it that Larys and your sisters make haste as well.”

You looked over at Rhaenyra, who was watching the results of the madness unfold with a sombered look on her face. But you had no time to decide whether or not to try and console her, for Ser Harwin had already begun to guide you out of the throne room. As instructed, he corralled his brother and sisters and made certain that they headed towards the exit too.

“Don’t,” he told you quietly as you passed the dead man’s body, evidently having read your mind. ��I wouldn’t look.”

You were thankful that Ser Harwin had strategically placed himself between you and the body as you walked by, for it had been your gut reaction to do just that. You gripped his arm as he escorted you that much tighter, thankful to have been spared from seeing such a ghastly sight.

As you passed under the threshold, the anguished sobs of Ser Laenor echoed off the walls behind you.

That evening, in a private ceremony witnessed by only the families of those involved, Princess Rhaenyra of House Targaryen and Ser Laenor of House Velaryon were wed. The remaining festivities that had been planned for the rest of the week were canceled. King Viserys decided that, given the events of the welcome feast, the sooner the two were wed, the better.

Despite the sense of gloominess that hung over the Red Keeps in the days to follow, personal good news had presented itself to you the very next morning. A raven had arrived, from Highgarden, no less. Negotiations were complete.

Your betrothal to Ser Harwin Strong was, finally, to be official.

At the end of the week, Princess Rhaenyra and her new husband Prince Consort left King’s Landing for a small post-wedding sailing trip.

Your betrothal was officially announced the following day. You were ecstatic- for now, you no longer had to hide or deny your attachment to the strongest knight in all the Seven Kingdoms. Instead, you could celebrate it. And you would, too- with any luck, the two of you would be wed in less than a few fortnights, a few moons at the most.

The day after the announcement brought another raven from Highgarden. But this time, the news was not the cause of any celebration.

Your father, Lord Tyrell, had succumbed to sickness.

Perhaps the Maesters had been wrong in their diagnosis of the ailment and ineffective with their treatment… Perhaps your father knew what was inevitable, but had held on just long enough to see to it that you would be looked after once he was gone.

…

The winds of change had come to blow through Westeros. With the winds, came storms.

But with Harwin by your side, you knew that you would be able to weather them all.

᯽ Part 4 of this story, From This Day, Part 1/2, can be read HERE. ᯽

A/N: Thank you so much for reading!🖤 I have (at least) one more part tentatively planned for this, but after started writing this, I came up with another idea... So, how do we feel about seeing the wedding?👀 Cuz I was gonna do another little time jump to the next part, but now I’m not so sure... Let me know what you think!

ALSO... does anyone else wanna talk about last night’s episode?! Because I have so many thoughts... ugh. It was so great. I cannot.

***The masterlist for this story can be found HERE.***

***Information about the taglist for this fic can be found HERE.***

Taglist: @whitetigerlover17 @littlebirdgot @te5s3ract @nerdboylover @piper570 @ephemeralninon @linkpk88 @kaygilles @hippzella @wicked-hg @thatgaytevinter @nowheredreamer @ateliefloresdaprimavera @saintspector @thebigbadbatswife @blazinglioness @itevilhag @chlo-feigh @bettybrainrot @liadamerondjarin @fuckmylifedudee @hippzella @my-dark-prince @sweetestrose569 @kaygilles @lol-im-done @im-married-to-chris-evans @chetpuff @venus2eros @wicked-hg @mamamooqa @prettymingwoo @bxdbxtxh15 @ateliefloresdaprimavera @brbaabs @novazoldyck @hoyaharper @shanzeyxsyed @microwaveallthedemons @piper570 @fireghost-x @lakamaa12 @holb32 @thesheelfsworld @inkareds @fuckoffthanos @mortallyspookyglitter @akinatrix @bingewatche @guerraandpaes @nonniecannie @mousse-au-citron @autumnleaves1991-reads @thesithdiaries @potatingpotato-reads @perpetual-exhaustion21 @sinful-wxrld @marvelcriminalhoe2 @redpool @blazinglioness @re-enjoy @itevilhag @jfcreading @prettywhencry1234 @dankpunks @justonemore-fic @yonduismarrypoppins @luckyplums1 @logiclies @avoirlu @iunknownveritgo @theflowerpot @anoymousbye @strawbbyjamb @landofdreamsworld @green-beanie @queenofterrasen418 @michovisk @psychwardsiren @green-lxght @smptxx @electric-bloo @acciowolfstar1 @good-night-starlight @never-not-eating @minetticawonderland @idkjj04

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mariamermaid · 4 years ago

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Darkest Nights

Regulus Black x fem Reader

Summary: It was blatant, that the day of your wedding would come. Yet, you feared it as much as he did.

Words: 2.2k

Warnings: Angst, arranged marriage

A/N: I don´t know too much about Regulus, which is why I decided to interpret this oneshot in my own way. (Also, Timothee Chalamet as Regulus= chefs kiss)

Denial was the first stage you encountered. Blatantly you had been prepared for it your entire life, but when the message reached you, it was still denial. It couldn´t be true, you were promised more time. Time to live.

Any excuse sounded better than the one thrown into your face: There was no other option.

You recalled word for word in your head as you starred at yourself in the large mirror. It should be an honor, you´ll be a good wife, you´ll have a big house. But none of it mattered to you, your priorities laid differently in society. Will I be happy?

The mirror, the room and the entire house was furnished with golden details; flowers, flourishes and patterns. It reminded you of the palaces in the renaissance period. You had loved the paintings from the time, but finding yourself in a similar ensemble on your wedding day felt all too wrong.

A knock appeared on the door and your mother entered, stunned with her hand over her heart as she admired you. The two servants, who had helped you to get ready, carefully stepped back. Their work was done. If it weren´t for your mother´s sake, you´d thank them from the bottom of your heart.

“You look absolutely gorgeous, he´ll be very pleased to see you.”

Yeah, because that´s all that mattered. Your eyes wandered back to your silhouette in the mirror; long, delicate arms of lace traveled down your skin, the train measured at least ten feet and the veil, which was still placed to show your face, followed the train. Your mother handed you the flower bouquet, white, blue and lavender. Then she pulled the veil over your face and nodded a last time. “Your father will be waiting for you downstairs. They´re all ready.”

Heavy chains were attached to your feet and each step you took, was harder.

Outside the hall, where the ceremony would take place, your father waited for you. He matched your mother´s dark attire, but as so often, he loved the embellishments on his suit. In your opinion, they always looked disgustingly conceiting and plump on him. Every cell in your body screamed for you to run and as you stepped inside the large hall, you wondered why you didn´t listen to your heart. Like the rest of the villa, it was stunning and a true architectural treasure. Dark, even wood was spread on the floor and the walls were delicately painted in cool grey tones. Against the gold details, the walls looked like painted clouds, dreamy and far away.

Within the dark ensemble the white spot like a ray of sunshine; you.

Why didn´t you run?

Would it be so bad to never see your family again? A family that had no emotional connection to you, you were never told, how much they loved you or even appreciated you.

You could live a free life, away from all pressure and deciding how you wanted to live. If you wanted to get marry, or not and even more importantly, who.

The painful truth was, that running even as far as you could, only brought you time. You were their only child, their only way to safely secure, pleasant and reputable future. They would find you eventually and by the mark on their forearms, it wouldn´t be a reencounter to spread joy.

Under the veil, none of them saw your shivering jaw and your blinking eyes in tears as you made your way to the altar.

Your father´s hand, softly put over the arm you had linked with this, grabbed you harsh enough to stop you from running. It might have looked like a lovingly scene, how he approached Regulus and placed your hand in his, but it wasn´t.

It felt like somebody threw away the keys from your chains.

Oh, right, Regulus was there as well.

You had barely acknowledged his presence, which was surprising due to the fact that he was your soon to be husband. You would never, not even on your deathbed, admit it, but he looked attractive. Plenty of times you had seen him wear a neat black suit, but today he didn´t look like Mommy´s boy put in attire. Somehow, he looked like a true man in front of the altar.

He seemed so steady and calm, was he even pressured into this?

You had spent almost your entire school career knowing him, he was a year older, but you couldn´t remember a singular conversation between the two of you. You started believing, you never had one.

Regulus wasn´t the scrawny kid anymore. He was tall and had a sleek figure, which he had proved many times as Slytherin´s seeker. His dark, rather short locks framed his angular face and his high cheekbones. He truly looked like a perfect descendant for a pure-blooded family.

His hand was warm, no hint of nervousness, while yours was as cold as ice. He barely glanced at you, both of you facing the altar and the wizard, who guided you through the ceremony.

He was a man of at least sixty years, grey hair and beard, but everything that left his lips, barely entered your conscience.

Finally, it felt like years, the peak of the ceremony had come.

You turned to Regulus, carefully and slowly, his long fingers grabbed the edge of your veil and pulled it back to reveal your face.

What did you expect to see in his expression? Excitement? Awe? Admiration?

For a split second, his jaw tensed, but he turned back to his neutral expression. You didn´t know how to pinpoint those bare split seconds, where his façade had vanished, and you didn´t like, not knowing how he felt. Was he glad to marry you? Was he only looking forward to this, because you were pure-blooded? Did he find you pretty or at least attractive? Or did he find you so attractive, that he wouldn´t hold himself back? Would he follow his instincts and ignore your potential feelings?

You wanted to curse and scream, but your eyes were glued on his lips and you felt how the magical string wrapped around your hands.

“Today Y/N and Regulus join their lives in the union of marriage. Before I declare you to one another, I want to hear you confirm that it is indeed your intention to be married today.”

The lie couldn´t be bigger. A no was stuck in the back of your throat.

“Now I ask you; Do you, Regulus Arcturus Black, take the hereby Y/N Y/L/N as you wife? If so, repeat after me.”

You waited for a stutter, but Regulus repeated the words without hesitation.

“I, Regulus Arcturus Black, take you Y/N Y/L/N, to be my wedded wife. I give to you in the presence of these witnesses, my promise to stay by your side, In sickness and in health, in joy and in sorrow. And cherish you for as long as we both shall live.”

“Bride, please repeat after me.”

Oh, dear Merlin help me to not completely ruin this.

“I, Y/L Y/L/N, take you Regulus Arcturus Black, to be my wedded husband. I give to you in the presence of these witnesses, my promise to stay by your side, In sickness and in health, in joy and in sorrow. And cherish you for as long as we both shall live.”

The magical promise, which wrapped around your hands like a hot string, tightened as the words left your mouth.

“I now announce you, husband and wife!” You felt how the golden glistening oath disappeared, but you still felt the warmth pressing against your skin. It was done. All plans and hopes for this not to happen, were completely useless. You were now officially Y/N Black, wife to Regulus Black. Regulus eyes pierced into yours, somehow you took the last of your strength to keep up the eye contact. Then, to your biggest surprise, he offered you the smallest hint of a smile.

“Even the most beautiful places turn dark during night.”

Regulus´s voice was steady, but quiet. For the first time this evening, he spoke to you in his own will. Without the pressure of a family member watching. You glanced at him, while his eyes were stuck on the ensemble. He was right, it was beautiful.

The light walls were barely enlightened anymore and the golden details, which glistened from time to time, seemed to float in the air. The delicate paint strokes had become invisible, vanishing into dark. Regulus fitted in, with his dark suit, green attire and jet-black locks and you contrasted him in a way, that couldn´t be more opposing. The white fabric attracted the last bit of light, like the rising moon beneath carpet of golden stars.

You had spent the early evening, which was turning into night already, with careless and empty conversation. Even though Regulus was at your side for most of it, you didn´t even perceive him. You were too focused on not crying, not running, not saying the wrong things, not falling over your dress, not eating too much food, not smiling too much, not fake smiling enough and not being you.

“I meant it, you do look stunning”, he added, tilting his head ever so slightly in your direction. Previously, the words had seemed nonchalantly thrown into a conversation. Now, it sounded honest and against his offish body language, Regulus was different beneath his façade.

“Thank you”, you replied with barely a whisper.

For once, he wished to be more like his brother Sirius, who swept of girls with no effort and compliments fell of his lips like the lies for his pranks. Of course, he wasn´t there.

Regulus never imagined that his bride would be you or even closely like you. He remembered you from school, something he never told anymore. Back then, you had barely exchanged words. You knew about each other´s existence, but a safe distance was kept. However, he remembered the evenings at the library. Where you had sat quite focused, tapping with your pen against the book. You had watched every single of his Quidditch games and you cheered.

You were cunning and smart, driven by your own ambition to surpass yourself, but unlike him, you were empathic. People approached you easily, feeling enchanted by your natural politeness. Regulus had become used to the shadow side; people evaded to not get in is way. They avoided him, not knowing what lied behind his dark exterior. Maybe they even feared him.

He knew it was wrong for him to feel relieved to find you in the spot of his bride, he was bereaving you of all prospective dreams and a chance for true love.

“I´m sorry.”

The apology took you by surprise and your head snapped towards him. “For what?”

He sighed, knowing he couldn´t dodge the eye contact anymore. “For having to marry me.”

The emphasis clearly laid on the word me, even though he tried to hide it.

“Are you happy to have me as your-“, you paused. You had never said it out loud. “As your wife?”

He chuckled. Regulus Black chuckled. “I knew marrying out of love was never an option, but honestly, you´re the best bride I could´ve wished for.”

He quickly became serious again, too fast for your taste. “You´re not like them, not as posh or artificial.”

“Apparently, neither are you.” You added, feeling how your body leaned a little closer to his.

“I try my best.”

The dark had covered expectations and superficiality and what was left, was a man at your side, who was honest and real. Not perfect, but not cruel. You didn´t fear him anymore and more importantly, you didn´t fear potential actions. He wouldn´t lay a hand on you, unless you would allow to do so. There was only one apprehension left, the dark mark burning on his arm.

You didn´t know how or why, but that obligation was reserved from you. Slytherin or not, pureblood or not, you weren´t evil. You weren´t one his fealty and you swore on your life, that it wouldn´t change.

Regulus felt your apprehension, but for now he wasn´t ready to share the perilous information with you. The horcrux inside the cave was his secret, but if it meant keeping you safe and sound, he was ready to risk it. For now, it was his task to make you believe him. Regulus Black wasn´t evil and he didn´t share the Dark Lords radical views. The dark mark on his arm was just like the ring on his finger, an inescapable path.

Carefully, but with clear intention, he took your hand. “I will never hurt you; I promise.”

You saw something inside his eyes sparkling, but you couldn´t pinpoint it. Pressing your lips together, you starred at the rings on your fingers. “You shouldn´t make a promise you can´t keep.” He opened his mouth to disagree.

“But promise me to be honest; talk to me Regulus. I don´t want this to be a marriage of secrets and intrigues.” He nodded agreeing. “I promise it, do you?”

“Yes.”

Cautiously, as if you could break beneath his touch, he placed a strand of hair behind your ear and slowly, waiting if you would push away his action, he placed a kiss on your forehead. You didn´t push him away, catching yourself almost leaning into it.

Yes, even the most beautiful places turned dark during night, but tonight the darkness revealed true nature. And in this darkest hour, the two of you were shining together strong as the brightest light.

#regulus black #regulus black imagine #regulus black x reader #regulus arcturus black #regulus black oneshot #timothée chamalet #harry potter imagine #sirius black #mariamermaidimagine

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lover-of-trash-and-people · 4 years ago

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netflix shadow and bone s1 e5 pt 1: pre-darklina peak (spoilers for the entire grishaverse) im doing three parts for this episode because i want to

ooh i see you ravkan double eagle oh shit malyen (also archie addressed the plot armour in smth I can't remember what and tried to frame it in a 'he can walk anything off' way) everything's just so pretty to look at oof Jesper and Inej's little eye rolls when the palace oprichniki checking them in says no guns, no knives do I think kaz blending into the oprichniki could have been done in a more clever manner? maybe okay seeing Alina bonding with the other grisha is so cute why did I just realise genya saying 'they need you for the kefta' to marie was foreshadowing good god do I love how Genya's tailoring is depicted in the series genyalina's at it again, with their adorable dynamic the implications towards Genya's situation feel both too much and too little, in my opinion (I will elaborate if asked) Genya's sad little eyebrow twitch when Alina says 'I've always wanted to (...) visit the library at the University of Ketterdam' </3 I've been thinking a lot about Alina's 'ive never really liked farms' as of late 'Powerful men' yeah break my heart why don't you Genya? Leigh really put Genya through the grinder before the series and throughout, she makes me so fucking sad omg I fucking forgot about genyadavid time, I'm hyped Genya immediately being shooketh as he enters and David straightening himself as Genya says expert resident fabrikator Genya following him with her eyes 'They're lovely!' 'Ingenious!' Genya, you simp, you Yes Alina let's go, come into your power 'see you at the fete' David turning and lingering and looking to his side and shutting the door behind himself in nervousness fucking cute as fuck genyalina stawp being cute omg I love them focussing on Kaz's limp at least a little bit (but then again, I'm able bodied, so I can't really tell if they're being um disingenuous) I love the addition of the changing room being fabrikator locked, although I would have liked a little jesper hint with the crows maybe Kaz's eyes narrowing as he takes note of the two keftas behind Marie (we love a good wink wink nudge nudge) okay jesper icon Also AMITA SUMAN'S WORKOUT REGIMEN MA'AM SHE'S SO COOL The Inej Jesper dynamic, that's it Kit Young, the man and the legend A REFERENCE TO BUTTER WEEK, you cuties Alina saying 'or a hat' hits different when you know Jessie asked for a top hat on a birthday and got it and wore it outside a lot (I love her so much) Genya asking Alina 'where did you learn to be so commanding' excuse me show, did you not show me Alina being commanding towards the grisha/oprichniki because I think that's rude The fact that the troupe having the Alina and the volcra act in it is hinted at when the crows first show up in Kribirsk, god I love this show the entire scene with the genyalina dynamic, the Alina play, Jesper finding out about Alina being Alina, Fedyor imitating Ivan and then calling him his better half, absolute perfection Malyen, you adorable himbo Mal's commander smiling at Mal saying 'I should be the one to deliver the news to her... To him. To General Kirigan.' malyen you little idiotic little baby boy nvm I'm happy enough at the wink wink nudge nudge of Jesper saying is there no way to... pick the lock? Arken didn't even see this door, how tf does he know? It was too easy and that made me very slightly disappointed Kaz saying Arken grabs the target is what made me sure Arken was sus and Kaz knew Also the fucking score 🤌🏽 chef's kiss Inej going 'we are?' eyebrow raise at lynx flush and Jesper merely shrugging is again a great way to highlight their differences

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nichehouse · 3 years ago

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Love turns Green with Shrek

More often than not, movies leave a mark in the hearts of their audience. Those who prove to be more remarkable than others give birth to spin offs, sequels, and sometimes even a third and fourth installation. For this to happen, a certain movie must be able to develop harmony among its components. And if a certain green ogre comes to your mind when thinking about a movie that was able to do it, well, we cannot blame you. Shrek is great, and here’s a few reasons why it is.

One-of-a-kind Characters

Of course, the title character tops the list. Shrek is a lot different from the usual knights in shining armor of other fairytale movies. He’s not a knight, he didn’t come from a ruling family, and to top it all, he’s not human. However, he has the same good heart and pleasing character, but him being an ogre who has intense and deep-rooted insecurities has remained to be the source of the conflicts of the various installations of the movie.

Princess Fiona also had similarities with other princesses who also had to break curses given to them at some point, Fiona is just more of a fighter who has a stronger personality. But, above all, what set her apart was that she didn’t actually break her curse - she decided to happily live with it.

For the ever-present animal sidekicks, we have Donkey and Puss and Boots. These two adorable creatures developed a unique and interesting combination, especially since there was a minor competition between the two for Shrek’s attention. They might not have many scenes focused on them, but in the rare occurrences that there is, it is sure to give the audience a laugh.

And well, how can we forget about the usually well-loved Prince Charming and Fairy Godmother jumping into the other side of the fence? It was a welcome twist, and one that made Shrek stand out from all other fairytale movies.

Rich Soundtrack

Another remarkable aspect of the Shrek movies are the banging soundtrack that has truly fitted and enhanced the scenes. The audience will not only appreciate the events unfolding before their eyes, but also the music playing in the background.

Shrek’s soundtrack gaming started strong by playing All Star at the first scene of the first ever Shrek movie. It was upbeat, catchy, and snappy which all fit the mood being set by the introductory scene. Hey now, Shrek, you’re an all star!

To cap off the first installation of Shrek, I’m a Believer was played during Shrek and Fiona’s wedding. No need for a huge venue and fancy outfits, the entirety of the scene was the perfect culmination of the first installation of the series. The song was able to capture their personalities - fun, light, and exciting. Plus, the cute little scenes between Donkey-the-lead-vocalist and Dragon didn’t hurt.

It’s not always fun and games though, as Shrek faced a real challenge in Shrek 2, when Prince Charming was about to steal Fiona from him. So when the Fairy Godmother blasted I Need A Hero through the entire palace, the scene was raised a notch higher. It was very fitting, a little fun amidst all the excitement, especially during the giant Gingerbread Man’s fight scenes. So, even if she’s evil, the Fairy Godmother and her choir was chef’s kiss.

Surprising Plot Twists

In addition to all the endearing things mentioned above, what has also captured the Shrek audience are the twists and turns in the story that were unexpected yet fitting to the plot.

For one, instead of turning into a conventionally attractive princess after she was kissed by Shrek, Fiona ended up being an ogre twenty-four-seven. Contrary to what usually happens after true love’s kiss, it seems as though Fiona did not break the curse but actually enhanced it. It was a sweet scene though, as she was able to prove that her love for Shrek - and the other way around - transcends the physical aspect of the relationship.

In the second Shrek movie, there were hints that the King - Fiona’s father - was hiding something that he owed to the Fairy Godmother. At the end of the movie, it was revealed that he was actually a frog. He didn’t sacrifice Fiona’s happiness just to keep his part of the deal, so his secret was revealed by the Fairy Godmother. This revelation also earned a collective gasp from the audience, and rightfully so. However, it seems as though the cross-breeding between two different species was common in the film.

Who would have thought that the Donkey and Dragon relationship will lead to adorable baby donkeys with wings? It was also totally unexpected and unhinted. But if you really think about it, the love was clear between the two, so maybe it was bound to happen, we just weren’t ready for that twist.

Relatable Lessons

The relatable characters from Shrek lead to relatable lessons from the movie. Even if we’re not kings or queens and we’re also not green, we can learn a thing or two from the experiences of the characters.

First is about accepting your flaws. Shrek 2 revolved on Shrek wanting to be unnecessarily better-looking for Fiona, with the belief that this was what he needed for his father-in-law to accept their marriage. This was not the case, though, as Fiona had always been willing to fight for him regardless of how he looks. This is the same for everyone. You must not compare yourself to your versions of Prince Charming, because your unique traits make you stand out from the others. And you must not struggle to blend in when you are born to stand out.

This goes hand-in-hand with getting out of your comfort zone and believing and loving yourself. Fiona used to hide when she used to turn to an ogre by night. Shrek doubted himself to be the King. But both of these scenarios had them believing in themselves, and the results turned out great. It is a little scary sometimes, but you’ll never know if you never try. As they say, it is better to try and fail than never to have tried at all.

The list of things that make Shrek great can go on and on, so if you’re looking for a sign to have that movie marathon with that adorable green ogre, this is it!

#Shrek #Shrek 2 #Shrek is love #shrek is life #shrek the third #shrek movie #donkey and dragon

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atvrvxia · 4 years ago

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sdkfjds i finally finished watching shadow and bone and i’m gonna literally rewatch the entire thing bc its so good and i have my first thoughts below the cut so people can avoid spoilers

JESPER AND MILO THE GOAT WERE SO CUTE WTF ?? that was a friendship i didn’t realize i needed. he just loved the goat sm and was so affectionate with it

just jesper in general. kit young stole the show with his acting and he just completely captured jesper’s vibes

THE KANEJ HAD ME DYING OH GOD

kaz’s lines to inej make me feel some type of way

amita suman’s acting as inej was completely beautiful ?? like you can see when she wants to show inej’s conflict and her humanity; how she’s so compassionate and also a believer

freddy carter as kaz was just... everything ?? i didn’t realize it was possible to fall in love even more with both an actor and a character and yet... this happened #noregrets though

just the crows dynamic over all

also the hints at kaz’s past with pekka rollins and rollins not remembering him... shit i need to see how this is gonna go down please even though i know how it went in the books

FEDYOR WAS AMAZING TOO just ?? give that man all the hugs. he’s one of my faves

rip dubrov and mikhael but like they were really funny and cute. epitome of boys will be boys honestly

after seeing the extended sneak peek last night, i started to slowly ship malina more than i did when i read the books and for good reason: not only was jessie and archie’s acting so believable, but the flashbacks to when they were children were just... so beautiful?? friends to lovers but like make it epic they said

at the same time, the darklina scenes (episodes 2-5, maybe one-ish scene in episode 7) were also really good?? especially episode 5 like wow ?? jessie and ben really sold it and ben’s facial expressions were just * chef’s kiss*

kinda laughed a lot whenever mal and kirigan were fighting tho?? just cause i just remember that meme with the post about how they made eye contact at a morozova bbq and dont wanna fight bc grandpa ilya would be disappointed and neither of them want that

THE CROWS HEISTING WAS EVERYTHING just im in love with all of them

underrated interaction: kaz and alina in episode 8

NO MOURNERS NO FUNERALS MENTION I LEGIT SCREAMED also with “make me your villain”

didn’t realize that they would do the aleksander name reveal this early but it was cute

DARKLING AND KAZ INTERACTIONS!! there was like 2 and 1 was super brief at the little palace but i really wanted to see kaz hit him with his cane. another 1 on 1 scene with them happened but no cane whacking so i was a little disappointed

ben barnes saying “moya tsaritsa” and the dude version for that with his accent just made me feel some type of way

DAVID OH GOD PROTECT HIM ?? he raised his hand and kirigan was like “no you dont have to *sigh* yes david?” shfksdfn basically give david more screentime 2k21

sad that there’s no sturmhond mention but there were hints about wylan showing up so thats wonderful

zoya had some character development which was really lovely honestly

overall, i loved this show and it was definitely more enjoyable than how the first book had gone and i cannot wait for s2

#∷『 bree speaks 』— ooc ∷#shadow and bone #∷『 TV SHOWS 』— shadow and bone ∷#shadow and bone spoilers #sab spoilers

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vaguely-gestures-to-the-void · 4 years ago

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Hindsight: My thoughts on Loki (2021)

Welcome back! Spoilers below!

I need to clarify that I watch Loki purely as an escape. I've got a biased perspective in that regard because I don’t actively try to find fault with the show, though there are definitely things I’m not so inclined to. This is more of what I noticed and think things mean and it’s something I’m doing for fun. Anyways, here's my thoughts on episode 2 my loves.

Episode 2: THE VARIANT

Pre-title scene

Miss Minutes’ monologue in the recap is different to the one last ep.

1985 Oshkosh, Wisconsin

C-20!

“Today’s guest performances” on a board. Don’t really know if it means anything tho.

The Iconic (TM) I Need A Hero scene.

Pony.

The green tent - the lair of Loki.

I know not everyone’s a fan of the lighting, but it made sense to me. They’re still in the dark about who Sylvie is.

Why does C-20 take off her helmet? For the drama?

I hope Sylvie cleaned her blade. Narnia taught me well.

The Time Samsung (I can’t remember what it’s called right now) says that the date’s 04/12/1985.

Loki’s first mission (?)

‘Volume 26’ - how many of these does Mobius have?? #giveMobiusajetski

“ONLY at your LOCAL AUTHORIZED DEALER” - subtext about the TVA being control freaks? Jet ski safety?

I googled Wake Magazine. They’re up to volume 20 from what I saw, whilst Loki is reading volume 26, so I guess that’s something

Loki and Miss Minutes lmaooo.

Behind Loki’s elbow is the taxidermy something from the last episode. Also confirms that Loki threatened Casey at Mobius’ desk lol.

The thing has an egg?? What the hell is Mobius collecting? (He’s a Harry Hart variant lmao).

There are little twitches in Miss Minnutes’ hands. That’s so cool!

The egg timer’s a nice easter egg (I’m a comedian).

Mobius! B-15! :)

Is it just me or do the minutemen look similar, but not exactly the same. Makes sense if they’re variants.

I just realised the lights are built into the ceiling. Whoops.

What’s Mobius’ favourite?

Couple of things:

The racks full of identical uniforms/ones just hung up on doors.

The music has started to pick up the pace, but not in the way we see later on in the episode.

There’s a sign saying ‘FARE THEE WELL’ on it. Google tells me that it’s ‘used to express good wishes on parting’. Dang that was some good foreshadowing!

The person that looks like Agatha is still present.

I wonder whether it was supposed to be colder or whether the weather was just like that when they filmed.

The pony’s still around.

I think B-15 certainty that “a Loki couldn’t have gotten the jump of C-20” comes from her experience with them. She constantly tries to make it clear that because she’s not a variant, she’d know Loki better than he would, which (personally) makes the revelation that she’s a variant feel more devastating.

Again with the lighting, they’re still in partial darkness, constantly moving in and out of the light. Whilst what Loki says about the variant setting a trap is true, it isn’t in the context that he says it. Sylvie whoops their asses later.

The black and red-orange flags remind me of tomb markers. It’s a stretch, ik.

B-15 only has tally marks on one side of her helmet.

Mobius has fake pockets in his suit jacket. They’re the worst.

The ticking increasing in tempo as they approach red line - great for setting up tension.

I believe that Loki uses personal space like a weapon - slowly approaching them from the front, and then going behind Mobius’ back when he wants his way. It would make anyone uncomfortable, especially on a subconscious level because there’s a threat behind you.

Or maybe it’s that I have different personal space boundaries, not everyone likes being approached from behind. Loki’s movement felt intentional at least.

Getting Mobius to physically turn his way because of that might have been very subtle manipulation?

Loki looking back and forth trying to judge their reactions lol.

I liked the music in this scene, it sets up tension for Loki’s first attempt at betraying Mobius but then doesn’t completely dismiss it when it’s resolved.

Ravonna Renslayer’s office

The music here is 18 morceaux, Op. 72, No. 2. Berceuse. 18 morceaux, Op. 72: No. 2, Berceuse (Arr. For Theremin and piano) by Clara Rockmore for anyone that’s curious. I found out through Natalie Holt’s Twitter (I think).

The score is, and always will be, perfection.

Mobius’ small talk amuses me.

“Why do you get to keep all the trophies from my cases in here, you don’t think I’d love having that roller skate?” Mobius, what about the thing on the shelf behind your desk????

Ravonna seems like she’s answered these questions before, but she has a fondness for him that makes me think they’re good friends.

Also does Ravonna have multiple complete collections of the Encyclopaedia Britannica in her office? What are those books??

“I hope it’s a double.” Me too Mobius, me too (drink responsibly).

I don’t get how people think Mobius doesn’t remember leaving the stains. It sounded like Ravonna was chiding him for a bad habit and Mobius just made up a remark, not confusion.

Although he does place the cup at a different spot to the rings.

The ship flying past in the windows is a wonderful detail.

“The variant likes to stall for time.” It's very satisfying to me how everything stays relevant. Every detail advances the plot/contributes to it.

“Look, I know you have a soft spot for broken things.”

“I don’t think so-”

“Yes you do.”

Both Mobius and Ravonna only look at the middle figure when referring to the time Keepers. Either the other two are side-lined or don’t contribute at all.

“I’ll delete him myself.” At this point in time, I think Mobius is serious. As the episode progresses, his status may have changed, especially after the Jet Ski philosophy session.

Ravonna’s sash on the peg reminds me of the ones the people talking to Casey were wearing in episode 1.

Man those doors are so cool.

Peak sitting outside the principal’s office energy.

Mobius whistles at Loki as opposed to talking to him like he does later.

Any screen shot from the following scene is pristine chaotic disaster bi Loki energy featuring tired-of-your-tomfoolery Mobius.

“Isn’t that precisely why I’m here?” This marked a change in Loki to me. Up until that point, he’d tried to use what he’d known, who he’d been by scheming his way to the Time Keepers. By admitting he wasn’t sure of his purpose, we’re back with the person at the end of the last episode. It’s very Loki to try all avenues to get what he wants, and after having his world turned upside-down a few times in a short period, maybe he just wanted the familiarity of his old tricks, who he thinks he is.

Loki tensing up and then trying to assert control again reaffirms what I just said.

Man, give Mobius a holiday after all of this. Loki really tested him, huh?

Loki definitely likes validation on some level.

TVA archives (a.k.a the Salad Scene)

I can’t believe that place really exists. The looks combined with the music are just *chef kisses*.

I’m not sure if I’m thinking of the right progression, but the music reminds me of a plagal cadence. Google examples and play it side-by-side, you’ll get what I mean, maybe someone knows what it really is?

On either side of the elevators near the Time Keeper statues are the signs TVA archives.

The symmetry pleases my goblin brain.

I believe the entire show was just flexing the skills of the Loki crew and I couldn’t be happier.

“Pretend your life depends on it. I’m gonna get a snack.” This was so funny in the trailers but Mobius is dead serious (delete him myself comment). And he couldn’t even enjoy his salad.

Love that the end of credits takes from some of the scenes in episode 2.

The archivist has neat glasses.

I want some TVA stationary y’all.

It’s that moment fam.

I can’t be the only one curious by the ‘DISPLACED by 000:000:002:162’. Is that in Units? It would explain why the time line looks slightly bendy whenever we see it, especially if Apocalypses are so frequent.

IT’S THE SALAD LADS!

Mobius is reading the magazine that Loki was looking at earlier. Jet skis are Mobius’ comfort character.

“Don’t set fire to the palace.”

Tom Hiddleston has so much energy, he can move so fast.

“Oh God.” - Mobius, Null Time Zone

“YOU.” - Casey, Null Time Zone

Casey!

No thoughts, head empty, the Salad (TM).

But seriously, people only seem to be at their tables with others that work in a similar section. Not hunters and analysts eating in tandem to me, folks.

Oh Casey. Please don’t hurt him.

Aw, Mobius’ little giggle warmed my heart. Owen Wilson’s giving me whiplash with Mobius. My heart can’t take this y’all.

79 AD Pompeii, Italy

They’re both so giddy, Your Honour, I love them.

Mobius snuck them out lol.

“Bird noises?”

“BE FREE MY HORNED FRIENDS, BE FREE!” The post wouldn’t be complete without this.

Loki just throwing food at people and telling them “...enjoy your last meal while you can” is top tier comedy to me.

This is the first time we see Loki openly say nothing matters. I feel like the case file on the destruction of Asgard really pushed him to treat fate as unchangeable.

LXXIX is 79. Nice one Loki crew!

Mobius’ eye twitching as he checks the variance is a nice touch.

Loki throws away the stick that was holding the goat pen closed at the end.

TVA Archives, TVA cafeteria

Mobius picked up those files so smoothly I had to re-watch it.

Their position reflected what they were talking about - when Loki thinks it’s his individual contribution, he’s walking separately to Mobius, but they meet up when working together. I loved the blocking in that little moment.

I seriously thought that Loki was unconscious when I first saw him asleep around Mobius. I’ll admit it, it felt out-of-character for someone with such bad trust issues. Both of them seem pretty tired tho.

It’s the Jet Ski conversation comrades!

I’m beaming. Mobius talking about Jet Skis was the only time I’ve really remembered it’s Owen Wilson talking. It’s such a fun line to think about!

Loki’s smile. Adorable.

Just go watch the scene, it’ll give you good brain juices.

Mobius does it all for the Jet Skis and nothing else. I don’t make the rules, the Time Keepers do.

“My own glorious purpose.” This is a recurring theme in the season. Ultimately, I think that Loki is going to run for as long as it brings in money/until Loki gets killed again. However, I do like to think that in following seasons we’ll move beyond setting up Phase 4 Marvel stuff and just get deep dives into Loki’s character, though it may happen in the later eps or not be as interesting. Part of what made this show so interesting is the new setting in the Marvel universe but it’s hard to make predictions as to whether it will last in a show featuring the God of Mischief. Whatever happens, I’m happy that we got to see Loki’s existential crisis together, lads.

The music picks up, signalling that this quiet moment is about to end.

“No one bad is ever truly bad. And no one good is every truly good.”

“Scared little boy.”

These lines mean a lot to me. Loki perceives Mobius as an equal, similar to himself but not completely identical. The TVA’s whole aesthetic is Kafkaesque (Disney+ used that word), the imperfections keeping the place from looking mechanical and orderly like what the TVA promotes itself to be. Loki wants Mobius to acknowledge it, but Mobius is in the past, not addressing what’s right in front of him, surrounding him. That’s probably because Mobius doesn’t believe, he accepts what he’s been told though Loki wants to change that. He’s still focused on his job, the variant. I don’t think Mobius will struggle against change in the ‘belief’ part as long as things are rational.

Kate Herron (director) said that the Kablooie scene was improv which makes me wish we had more B roll of Owen and Tom. They seem so professional, invested and fun on set.

“No wonder you’re so bitter.” I’m sorry Mobius you sound as salty as your salad.

‘Artificially flavoured chewing gum’ Has something happened causing artificial flavouring to be preferred?

‘Blue’ has canonically changed to ‘Bloo’ by 2050 in America in the MCU. I blame capitalism.

Why does Mobius look so tiny? I say that like Owen Wilson wouldn’t look like a giant next to me lol.

Owen Wilson is 3.5 inches (9 centimetres) shorter than Tom Hiddleston. Yet he is dwarfed as Mobius. I need to stop talking about this and move on.

There’s no ‘variance energy detected’ line in the report.

“You’re gonna take my job if I’m not careful.” Loki looks so chuffed.

One day, I’ll properly address my thoughts on the shipping. Until then, I just want no one to die.

“Yeah, he’s doing great.” Mobius is so hyped. Good for him.

Owen Wilson has dimples.

Ravonna’s screen doesn’t show the timeline like it does later.

Ravonna is the done mom friend. Sane, undeserving of this, please give her a jet ski moment.

Buckle up folks because the last twenty minutes of this episode are my favourite so far.

At 34 minutes in, we get the music fading in with “Okay. But Mobius...” and a transition to my favourite composition so far. Natalie Holt outdid herself. The soundtrack is nearly constant, there’s no break for a moment of clarity anymore. The progression of events is inevitable, tying the bow on a plot line created in an hour and a half. The little embellishment from the strings (possibly) as Mobius and Loki exit is perfect. Combined with Loki’s raised fist leading to a pan to the ceiling, it prepared the audience for everything being turned upside down.

The changing camera angles and shot lengths (the continuous shot when B-15 takes the knives, the circling behind as the briefing occurs) keep viewers on their toes. The continuous shot is fluid, B-15 doesn’t look at Loki or Mobius, her reaction is natural and that just proves that the timing on that scene was impeccable. The circling behind reminded me of Loki positioning himself behind Mobius as he did earlier, but now he’s on the same side, part of the team though he continues to distinguish between himself and the variant. The building sensation that change is coming is met by the incredible swell in the music as we watch the picturesque Haven Hills get destroyed by modern technology and face the terrifying reality that is the Roxxcart store. There’s a close up on the Roxxcart storefront with school buses with the words ‘Evacuation shuttle’ in the background as we see the TVA’s minutemen come out reinforcing that even when the end is nigh, large corporations will loom over. A storm is raging with worse to come. I can go on and on, but you get the point.

2050 Roxxcart Disaster

I love that y’all are calling this the Alabama supermarket breakup. Makes me chuckle, that’s for sure.

I too hate when people can hear my footsteps. Someone that gets the struggle.

Sylvie places the TVA Samsung over a Roxxcart Security manual. She’s overridden both and is in control.

The date is 03/15/2050.

I think that the way the Hunters and minutemen hold their baton things is so that they don’t get yeeted. Neat.

As always, the beats are slick yo.

I hope the Azaleas guy gets some Azaleas wherever he ended up.

I love the way Loki says “In this storm.” It’s so satisfying for no real reason.

The wonderful Wunmi Mosaku does not get the recognition she deserves for this scene. She switched from B-15 to Sylvie so effortlessly. They’re two distinct characters, her facial expressions, body language everything changed in that instant. Even from the one line, “No, they usually survive,” her delivery had changed in a way that was noticeable. It’s uncanny, exactly what was needed when facing a foe that remained unseen. And the smile? It’s before we know the variant as Sylvie, so naturally it’s that signature Loki smile with a hint of malice we associate with the variant. Damn y’all, Wunmi’s incredible! I really hope she’s recognised for being so talented in this series, if not in all her other work!

Mobius really cares about those people. I really want his redemption (?) arc.

It’s been pointed out that even in those conditions, Roxxcart were selling blankets and water. I think it means that by 2050, cash would be defunct. If only electronic payment existed, as long as there’s electricity they can run a business. Chew on that.

If the man they speak to is 50 to 60, he was a 90s kid.

There must be a difference in the reprogramming or kind of variant selected to be a hunter as compared to an analyst. The Hunters look after their own, but the analysts (or Mobius) go as far as empathising with variants.

C-20 is sitting in front of safety standards.

“A bit amateurish.” Loki knows that the variant isn’t as skilled with magic as he is.

As Loki and the possessed people walk, the lighting becomes brighter. He’s moving out of the shadows.

Me too Loki, I’m worried about B-15 too.

Sylvie unironically saying bless is hilarious.

Randy must be hella tall.

There’s a low angle shot as Loki and Randy face off with the flickering light above with a sign hanging above them like a sword of Damocles and a physical separation. Terror is nearly constant in Loki's life now, but he responds by letting go of his drive to survive.

The subtle swells in the music just add to my rising blood pressure.

C-20’s voice over is sad lads.

“I wanna go home,” we know she’s not referring to the TVA.

Mobius seems like a caring person.

When B-15 sits up and searches the room, I think it’s her realisation. Her shiver was from fear and shock, the music wasn’t about her not seeing Loki, it was about the TVA and what had happened to her.

The head snap and the score timing matching. So satisfying.

“I would never treat me like this. Hi.” I think that’s Loki realising that his foe is not willing to talk their way through conflict.

This fight scene contradicts all the magic we see later ik, but if he didn’t want to hurt anyone and was trying to draw out the real enemy it made sense.

Some of Sylvie’s powers must come into the people she possesses. The guy punched a glass screen and didn’t even bleed.

“I have shit to do.” Sylvie wasn’t raised with court etiquette (from what we know) and her lexical choice reflects that.

Dell computers survive into 2050 in the MCU. So do those robot dogs and Roombas. I am only happy about the Roombas. Where did the real dogs go? :(

“Mobius.”

“Where is he?”

“I lost him.”

“What happened?”

“I...”

Until now, B-15’s delivery has felt slightly rhythmic, like she was used to having the same arguments, particularly with Mobius. When she trails off however, I think it’s her trying to rationalise what she’s been through with Sylvie’s possession. Her devotion to the TVA was rooted in the fact that she wasn’t a variant, her life had a purpose and it was intentional. This must have rocked her, I’m invested in where she’ll go.

THE CUT TO BLACK OH GOOD GOSH.

Sylvie, my queen. I’d roll off a cliff for her.

The person with the moustache (you know the one) has pure fear on his face.

Ravonna knows what’s up.

And so do you, yes it’s the music, go listen to it.

THE RED LIGHTING

The zoom out to that incredible hallway shot and then stopping behind the time door. It was never about him after all, he was in the background of her plans.

Sylvie’s wave in Roxxcart vs. Loki’s on the train. Discuss.

The blackout, thunder and Loki’s pause under the flickering red and white light, do y’all really want me to talk about the s y m b o l i s m????

He’s conflicted, you know it, I know it, Mobius knows it.

Speaking of Mobius, there he is, we cut back to Loki and see him make his decision, zooming back in on him.

And with that final flourish in the score, we are done with episode 2!

Cue the most amazing end credits score you’ll ever hear.

Do yourself a favour, listen to all of it, including the part after the main credits, both are Works. Of. Art.

Ep 2 review

In case you didn’t notice, this is my favourite episode so far. There are parts I didn’t take to as much, but details from the previous episode being used in the plot as well as others being explained by Sylvie in episode 3. Rewatching it was easier than episode 1 though it left me wanting more. It will get more interesting from here, but until then, that was a fun romp.

See y'all next time. I hope whoever's reading this has a wonderful day!

Part 1, Episode 1 extend review link:

#spoilers #loki review #Loki spoilers #my respect for people that write scripts/analysis of any kind has increased immensely.#opinion #things i've noticed #sorry if they're not original #b-15 deserves love #the analysts (mobius) the hunters the minutemen casey every one of them deserves love #here's to everyone who worked so hard and put so much into this series #WUNMI MOSAKU IS AMAZING #I love Ravonna #It's great

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idealnreal · 5 years ago

Note

Please overanalyze the shadows in his palace I am begging you.

@appleyjuiceboy / jester owns my braincells of course i would do this for u

Okay so i think its best if i go about the order of shadows we meet in the game so. I’m not going to go into the persona/shadows in maruki’s palace. I’ll leave that for some other day. Now! Lets hope i can remain fully coherent.

1) The fluffy haired noodle shadow we meet for (ka)sumi’s awakening

First off, look at the design of this shadow--it has the fluffy hair parted to the right like maruki, its androgynous figure, and that swirly face mask as well! The mask has two eyes, and it even looks like theres a smile there, lopsided.

We have never seen any other palace shadow taking a similar shape as the palace ruler (except maybe the yaldaboath palace). Shadows are meant to emulate what the ruler thinks of as protectors of their heart. Maruki doesn’t trust anyone other than himself with this secret. And particularly at this phase of his distortion -- there are no scientists, to attendants, no patients. Just an empty, beautiful palace -- with possibly only one type of shadow and protector. The type that represents himself.

(Also androgynous/nb maruki confirmed ?? yes)

Okay then lets look at what this shadow says to Kasumi.

Shadow: ... Heresy. You dare to spurn our lord’s mercy. Accept yourself... Our lord laments the foolishness birthed from your pain.

Having the context that Kasumi is Sumire here ... Because this scene comes about because Kasumi sees a cognitive version of herself (Sumire) blaming herself -- and so, a part of her is probably trying to remember that she is Sumire. Thus ‘spurn(ing) our lord’s mercy’. And yeah accepting herself as Kasumi instead of trying to remember that she is Sumire.

But most important is the fact that Maruki’s palace shadows refer to him as a religious or god-like being (’our lord’s mercy’ calling back christian themes). Someone who is merciful and, most of all, does feel grief over one’s pain. Painting an ideal picture of a loving and caring god, ala abrahamic religions. This is a running theme with all the shadow’s dialogs. Let’s put a pin in this for now.

These design shadows are seen again later in the container room of the palace. They’re slightly faster. The container room is a strange one -- because it doesn’t quite fit in with the rest of the laboratory/hospital/garden of eden thing going on. While yes labs and hospitals do have storage areas, i cant imagine them being a container warehouse like this. I do headcanon that this is a storage area for the pain and suffering that Maruki has taken on from other people in order to heal them, due to his hyper empathy -- but i’ll analyse the room some other time. For now it’s interesting that the Maruki-like shadows are now relegated to this specific and really dark section of the palace.

Like the throne room/centre of eden that the Maruki boss fight takes place in -- He resigns himself to the darker gloomier parts of his palace. And the same goes for these shadows. This is where he belongs.

Also abso-fucking-lutely we’re going to talk about how this shadow transforms when it ambushes you:

Skin suit opening up to reveal fangs and rows of teeth, and a formless monster inside. Maruki ... dude ... are you okay? If these shadows are meant to emulate him -- is this how he sees himself sometimes? HHh boy...

2) First lab coat wearing shadow at the start of his palace investigation

Prior to this, while we understood that Maruki was a researcher, it was never a defining feature of him. Like the first thing that came to my mind on Maruki was that he was just the school counsellor and snack purveyor. Now this entire researcher, scientist, side of him is in full display. And this is the most common type of shadow we see, some which are violent, and others are non violent. Maruki sees scientists as the main residents of his palace -- his drive towards investigation and discovery, to puzzling out the intricacies of the human heart, human mind, and human pain. To better further his ability to heal. But there’s also a sort of cold, methodical nature to these scientists. Their ‘healing’ is methodical, based in science.

This coupled with the religious reverence and ideology that their dialog suggests, is a nice contrast. Experiments, data, research, are people’s salvation. Not the simple belief of a deity or of a higher purpose -- but science. Science, in many ways, becomes part and parcel of their religious belief.

Shadow: Those guises ... You aren’t among those who desire salvation. Leave. You are unwanted intruders. Do not disturb our lord’s research-- this world’s salvation. Why do you willingly strive for self-suffering? Why are you reaching out to your own pain?

So here -- the shadow wants them to leave the palace well enough alone. To leave Maruki to his research, and to allow this reality to exist. They don’t want this to end violently and it seems like they’re okay with the trio not ‘desiring salvation’. And when the trio refuse to leave, the shadow asks them why they want to suffer. It’s something inconceivable to them. Maybe even challenging their resolve-- to reconsider their current path, which will only lead to more pain. Also ‘salvation’, ding, on the christian theme counter. Deliverance from above from sin, even redemption. Not for one person, but for the whole world.

We see this type of shadow again before the scene in the auditorium.

Shadow: You are misguided. Do not search for pain. Only tragedy awaits you beyond here. [After defeating it] Such a fool, rejecting our lord’s mercy. In that case -- witness it for yourself.

Same themes. Delicious. Lets move on now shall we.

3) Hastur -- the shadow that appears with Maruki at his reveal as his second-in-command / bodyguard

I don’t think i’ve talked about how much i love the lopsided smiles on these masks. Because i love it. it’s just the right amount of unsettling and creepy. fUCk. And the twitching, twisting, and the weeping blue paint that Hastur’s shadow form does before transforming is /chefs kiss. I wanted more.

Anyway, onto Hastur’s design. Not a labcoat this time, just an ordinary looking white suit with no tie. This is the only time we see Maruki have a bodyguard shadow -- something else he relies on. Hastur’s presence in this scene only shows how deeply afraid and uncomfortable Maruki actually is with intruders in his palace. This experience is a reminder that someone had come into Rumi’s parents house to kill him years ago (a theory for another time). Like that incident years ago, he doesn’t resort to violence here -- he did and does try to negotiate. But when that didn’t work, at least now he has something that can fight for him.

( It is only in the second infiltration when we see Maruki actually take a more active role -- but I won’t get to that here. )

Hastur: Stubborn imbeciles, rejecting our lord ...

There is a running theme here, unfortunately. The shadows again cannot comprehend why anyone would choose to reject Maruki’s salvation, why anyone would choose suffering. And words like ‘foolish’ ‘misguided’ and finally ‘imbeciles’ here are all used to describe those who choose to reject it. While i do think Maruki only bends reality if the person wishes it (subconsciously or consciously), and does accept that there are people who won’t accept their wishes being granted and is aware of the reasons why-- He cannot fully understand or emphatise with it.

4) These deformed Maruki-like shadows guarding the control room

Jesus christ above, i don’t like these, because they contrast with all other designs as these are more brutish and deformed. There’s used as gatekeepers at certain points of the palace, in the first control room, and later on in the brain-pod-room (my brain cells are stopping to work now excuse me) before the garden puzzle portion, at his final will seed and the entrance to the garden of eden.

We know Maruki isn’t a brute strength kinda person. And yet we see these few who’s only purpose is to defend certain things and areas with force. Its uncharacteristic, but at the same time, given the things that these shadows are defending -- it makes sense. No cunning, no wit, no negotiation, no compassion -- just forcefully defending very important parts of his heart and his work.

Shadow (at the control room): So you dare defy His Excellency. You shall not interfere with our master’s work!

Shadow (brainwash room): Foolish rebels! You won’t take one step past here!

Shadow (entrance to garden of eden) : You?! I can’t believe you’ve made it so far ...

I had to do a double take on this. I think this is the only time this title ‘His Excellency’ has been used in the palace. While it is used for catholic bishops and that sort -- its mostly used in the context of heads of state, ambassadors-- more secular roles. The other times this shadow speaks is also similarly less reverent, less religious orientated. Of course this makes sense if the only function of these shadows is to use force to defend. They’re not the scientists or the first maruki-imitation shadows -- they’re not as devoted, and they dont have to be.

5) Finally, these limbless noodles

This one is found during the horticulture portion of the palace. I can’t exactly figure out why. And as far as i can tell, they only appear in this portion of the palace.

As far as the design goes -- these are probably the most unhuman like. Slender, androgynous with only a mask. I’ve got nothing. Braincells ran out. Sorry!

(Haha androgynous maruki go brr)

SO! That’s it. thanks for coming to my ted talk and following me down this rabbit hole. I need to go and drink some fuckin tea.

#(( jester being a real bro here #(( enabling me and my insanity #f: notes #c: the self #takuto maruki #(( slides this into the main tag #appleyjuiceboy #p5r spoilers

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kateknowsdramas · 4 years ago

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i'm still in ep 8 and The flashback actually makes me both more sympathetic towards Daeyeop and more violent (as in thinking he needs some dunking in the ice cold Han River).The confirmation that Sukyeong was in love with Daeyeop was not surprising but I was honestly floored that she had gone as far as asking him to elope with her. But the aspect that really broke my heart in that flashback is actually Daeyeop's refusal because honestly, given the circumstances, it was probably the best choice--

(cont) --if they wanted to stay alive. Eloping would have meant death for them. He really did not have a choice if he wanted to keep her alive and safe. That moment was absolutely and completely heartbreaking. And the regret, it must have been eating Daeyeop alive. Had Sukyeong successfully married (and maybe even have children) with his brother, Daeyeop could at least have comforted himself that Sukyeong is living well.

But to watch her be in mourning for these past few years-- her mourning clothes must have been like swords each time he saw them; A constant reminder that Sukyeong cannot live well. But regret cannot change past choices -- this will be a cruel lesson for Daeyeop. And the rejection (cutting ties) scene! ugh chef kiss!

I love how absolutely honest and straightforward SY was in rejecting DY . That entire conversation was fire. I think my favorite aspect about this rejection in comparison to past ones is that this time, she just presented her stance and perspective instead of framing her choice in relation to how it would affect DY. This time,instead of saying why DY should go back and leave her alone, SY went straight for the jugular and told DY to get lost because things have change for her--her feelings have

I hope that these asks are all from you, Bossam Anon!

The flashback really was heartbreaking because we did see how they were in love with each other - she wanted to leave with him but his rejection hurt her to the core. He essentially said that he wouldn't elope with her and would allow her to be sold (she was, really) to his brother and stay under his father's control. For a woman as independent and strong as Soo Kyung is, she needs a man who is equally as strong and brave. And Dae Yeob just doesn't quite fit the bill.

Her rejection of him and cutting the ribbon was so in line with her character. There wasn't hesitation - just resolution that this had been a long time coming and he wasn't ready for the kind of commitment she needed. Her time with Ba Wu changed her - opened her eyes to the type of people who could be on her side and were willing to do anything to help her. She didn't have that in the palace. She was used as a pawn and told to die to preserve her father's throne. So now she has someone who will be by her side and that's worth everything to her.

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i-choose-liam · 5 years ago

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Two’s Better Than One - King Liam x MC

Summary: Liam is more stressed than he's ever been before. A certain guest coming to the palace has prompted this anxiety in the Cordonian King. How will Liam fare against his special guest?

Book: The Royal Heir

Characters: King Liam, MC (Riley Spencer), Dani Spencer (OC), Hana Lee, Maxwell Beaumont, Drake Walker, other original characters.

Rating: T

Word count: 1k+

A/N: This is a short series about Riley’s family. If you read this, let me know if you like it. Reblogs are always appreciated. Thanks!

Cordonia

The staff at the palace was rushing back and forth. “Yellow! Not pink! How do you get the two confused?!”, Liam’s assistant yelled at a staff-member. The unwanted linen was taken away in a cart, the sound of the wheels just a part of the entire hustle-bustle. Dani witnessed the scene in passing as she walked past the staff towards the nursery. One of Riley’s incompetent bodyguards, the hot one, was guarding the doors to the nursery. They gave her a nod. “Miss Spencer” She gave a mock salute and walked in as the doors were opened for her. The light from the windows was the first thing to catch her eye. Cordonia sure had a lot of sunshine. And said sunlight was making the couple standing in the middle of the room look like ethereal angels. Liam was talking to someone on the phone, but he perked up at once on seeing Dani. He hung up and walked over to give her a hug. “You made it”, he said, smiling. Dani hugged him back and kissed his cheek as they parted. “’course I did”, she said, “As if I would miss my niece’s first ever party” Riley spoke in that supercilious tone her voice took on when she was trying not to be condescending. “It’s a ‘royal luncheon’ in honour of Eleanor, not a party” Dani walked to her, saying, “Leave it to you to literally take the word party out of an actual party, Riles” Riley smirked, “Good to see you too, my evil twin” “You’re the evil twin” A gleeful gurgle came from the bundle in Riley’s arms. Dani got close enough to look at the cuteness-bomb her niece, Princess Eleanor of Cordonia, was. “Hiii, angelll”, Dani cooed. “You wanna hold her?”, Riley asked. Dani was still smiling down at little Eleanor. She said, “What do you think I flew all the way here for?” Riley quipped, handing over the baby to Dani, “The free booze?” She was already making kissy faces at her niece, holding her with utmost care. “No, no, no”, she said, “Aunt Dani came here for Eleanor. Didn’t I, sweetheart? My god, Riley, she’s sooo cute! I can’t believe she came out of you” Dani bounced Eleanor a little in her arms. She was doing her best to be careful, the baby was only three months old, after all. Eleanor fixed her dark, bright eyes on Dani’s face, smiling as if she enjoyed the bouncing. She gave another heart-melting gurgle, forming a tiny drool-bubble at the corner of her mouth. The bubble rose above her face, startling Eleanor. Her eyes went wide and she exclaimed “Wooh! Wooh!” as she stared at this strange anomaly near her face, shaking her fists and legs all the while.

“It’s just flight information. What is so- you know what? Meet me in my office. I’m coming down there in a minute”, Liam was saying on the phone. Dani exchanged a knowing look with her twin. She raised an eyebrow. Riley nodded. “Did you scare him?”, Dani asked. Riley said, “I didn’t. He has been researching about them for almost a week” Liam walked to them then. He sounded frantic. “Dani, I hope you’re being taken care of well. If you need anything, I’ll be in my office. Don’t hesitate to ask for anything, okay?” Before she could reply, he was saying, “And I’ll see you as soon as I can, my love. I’ll be back” Both Dani and Riley stared at him in surprise as he kissed his daughter’s forehead, having clearly meant the words for her and not his wife. Liam strode away to the door, leaving Riley gaping after him, narrowing her eyes at his frame. As if realizing he had forgotten something, Liam turned around and walked to her. He was grinning. “Sorry”, he kissed her on the cheek, “Won’t happen again. I love you” “Uh-huh”, Riley replied. Dani bounced Eleanor in her arms again, taking in the look on her sister’s face. She smiled at Riley, “Poor guy” Riley just sighed.

***

Maxwell was humming under his breath as they sat in the antechamber to Liam’s office. Hana was saying to Drake, “And you made sure to ask the chef that he only use halal meat and sustainably sourced seafood?” “Um…”, was Drake’s answer. Maxwell chimed in, “Relax, Hana. You’re still in-charge of everything else. Liam just asked Drake to supervise the prep for the American dishes” “I know that”, Hana said timidly, “I’m just making sure” She sighed, saying, “Sorry if I seemed to be meddling, Drake. I prefer discussing this stuff with Liam and Riley. But Riley is spending time with her sister and Eleanor. And Liam’s just been so preoccupied lately” “Speaking of…” Drake indicated the door to Liam’s office. The King walked towards them at a brisk pace, taking a seat across from Maxwell. “Thanks for waiting, guys”, Liam said, tugging at his cravat.

Before he could even catch his breath, Liam was talking again. “Maxwell, I hope you followed the instructions for the entertainment program”, he said. Maxwell nodded, remembering all the non-party-esque instructions he had had to follow. “Of course. Nothing too loud, no fireworks, no confetti. Nothing un-eco-friendly. And Celine Dion will be performing shortly after lunch” “Thank you. Drake, the food and alcohol?”, Liam turned to him. “Yep. I talked to the chef. She said this might be the first time we’re going to serve fried chicken for a luncheon at the palace. Vegetarian options are available in three different Asian cuisines. And I personally selected the single malt…” Liam shot up in his chair, surprising everyone in the room. “No, no, no. No whiskey. I specifically told you she hates whiskey. Vodka. Vodka and cocktails are what she will be served”, he said, face harried. Drake said slowly, “Okayy…” Liam turned to Hana next. He said in a pleading voice, “I know you’re the only one who would never disappoint me, Hana. How are the rest of the arrangements?” She assured him, “I have followed all your instructions to the letter, Liam. And I have done my fair share of research on Analyn Torres. I’m going to do a debriefing for the palace staff before the flight lands. Maxwell will be with you at the airport for the welcoming” “No, I need you with me at the airport. I mean, I need Maxwell and you there with me” Drake scoffed, “Gee, thanks, Liam” Liam tugged at his cravat again and walked to the coffee table. He poured himself a glass of water from the pitcher and emptied it in one go. Maxwell looked at Hana with meaning, who looked at Drake, quietly urging him to talk to the King. “You know”, Drake said to Liam, “I haven’t seen you this nervous ever before. You okay, man?” Liam didn’t answer. He flopped down into his seat again, closing his eyes and absently rubbing his forehead. Hana tried, “You have addressed an entire congregation of world leaders at the UN, and you didn’t sweat a drop. This can’t be more difficult than that, Liam” Liam replied, “I have to make a good first impression” Maxwell said, trying to lighten the situation, “You are the King of one of the wealthiest, coolest countries in Europe, Liam. And she’s what? A college professor?” Drake seemed to agree. “Maxwell’s right. I don’t see why you have to be so afraid of meeting your mother-in-law. She’s probably the opposite of Spencer. She’s probably like Dani, and not Riley” Liam mumbled, “The other one is” Maxwell was confused. “What?”, he asked. Liam sighed. “Riley told me her “Mom”, Razia Spencer, is the relaxed, carefree one like Dani. My other mother-in-law, Dr. Analyn Torres, is an activist and a tenured professor at Columbia University, who’s known for her scathing criticism of capitalism and monarchy. She made the High Chancellor of Auvernal cry during his first and last visit to the USA” The room was suddenly quiet enough to hear the ticking coming from the clock on the wall. Hana said nothing, looking sympathetic to Liam’s cause of concern, as if she had known these fun facts all along. Maxwell just stared at one face from another, not knowing what to say. Drake broke the silence. “Well, damn”

***

Somewhere over the Atlantic Ocean –

Analyn scrolled the webpage on her laptop. The plane lurched a bit, sudden turbulence rocking her in her seat. She stayed calm enough to finish reading the latest from the Cordonian Daily. She kept assuring herself she was not trying to gather ammunition to use against her son-in-law, but part of her felt guilty just the same. She had promised her wife she wouldn’t judge their son-in-law before she even met him, and she always kept her promises to Razia. “Baby?” Analyn closed her laptop and turned to her wife, who was just stirring from a four-hour nap. She smiled at the look of confusion on her wife’s face, something which amused her to no end even after thirty years of marriage. Razia’s short hair fell across her eyes, which she was rubbing sleepily. “Are we there yet?”, she asked, half asleep. “No, my love. Still an hour or so, I think” “Okay” Razia clutched Analyn’s arm and rested her head on her shoulder again. She said, with her eyes closed, “Did you finish reading about Liam?” “I-I wasn’t… um…” “It’s okay. I won’t tell Riley. Hehe” Analyn smiled and put an arm around her love, saying, “Go to sleep, you. We’ll be in Cordonia soon” “I hope Eleanor’s got Riley’s eyes” “I quite like Liam’s eyes too” “He’s good-looking but, you know. Our baby’s our baby” “A stubborn 26-year old, yes” “Shush. We haven’t seen her in forever. We’re just going there to see her and our granddaughter, okay? No fighting” “Yes, darling” “Good. I sleep now. Good night” “It’s morning”, Analyn grinned. “Mhm” Her wife was asleep again in minutes. Putting away her laptop, and her inhibitions for the time being, Analyn wrapped her arm tighter around Razia and closed her eyes. She hoped to get some sleep before meeting her royal son-in-law for the first time. They had so much to talk about.

#liam x mc #king liam x mc #trh liam x mc #riley & dani #princess eleanor of cordonia #trh fanfiction #trh #the royal heir #fanfiction #thatoclady fanfics #playchoices

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wetalkinboutbooks · 5 years ago

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Girls of Paper and Fire by Natasha Ngan

Summary: Each year, eight beautiful girls are chosen as Paper Girls to serve the king. It's the highest honour they could hope for...and the most demeaning. This year, there's a ninth. And instead of paper, she's made of fire.

In this richly developed fantasy, Lei is a member of the Paper caste, the lowest and most persecuted class of people in Ikhara. She lives in a remote village with her father, where the decade-old trauma of watching her mother snatched by royal guards for an unknown fate still haunts her. Now, the guards are back and this time it's Lei they're after -- the girl with the golden eyes whose rumoured beauty has piqued the king's interest.

Over weeks of training in the opulent but oppressive palace, Lei and eight other girls learns the skills and charm that befit a king's consort. There, she does the unthinkable -- she falls in love. Her forbidden romance becomes enmeshed with an explosive plot that threatens her world's entire way of life. Lei, still the wide-eyed country girl at heart, must decide how far she's willing to go for justice and revenge. (Taken from Goodreads).

Our Ratings:

→ Geena: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

→ Kae: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Overall: We really enjoyed this book!! It was well-written, had both engaging characters and an interesting plot. The world building is well done, the plot twists are WILD, and the romance is wholesome. TW: Assault, but Natasha handles that well. The spoiler-full discussion is below the cut.

The Good:

Lei and Wren

Kae: Okay. So we have Lei, the main character with these ~wonderful~ golden eyes. She is taken from her home on account of her golden eyes and delivered to the King as a gift. This all happens because a guard wants to get back on the Kings good side. Now, our girl is a concubine

Geena: We also meet Wren and we know almost nothing about her other than she’s hot (according to Lei) and cold. In addition, a group of other concubines, one of which... Blue... has it out for Lei.

Kae: Wren! I liked Wren from the start. She captured my attention the way she captured Lei’s. She’s always watching. Always calculating. Always alert. We soon learn that Wren’s cold demeanor is just a facade and she’s secretly a bad bitch.

Geena: I agree, I also liked that Wren was written aloof, but not like an asshole like Blue was shown to be. Both Blue and Wren were from powerful families, but Wren knew how to act. Also! The development we see from Lei seeing Wren and just thinking she’s hot like every other girl and slowly falling for her was *chefs kiss*.

Kae: Watching Lei slowly fall in love with Wren was so nice to see. In a lot of YA books, the character meets the love interest in one chapter, then they’re declaring their love two chapters later. So it was refreshing to see them fall for each other the way they did. I liked how the audience knew Lei liked Wren, but LEI DIDN’T KNOW SHE LIKED WREN. Silly girl! Wren also takes her time with Lei and allows Lei to take the lead most of the time. They’re going at Lei’s speed and whenever she isn’t ready for something, Wren backs off like the suave lady she is.

Geena: Oh my god, you’re so right, I didn’t even notice. Wren is probably the most respectable love interests I’ve seen written in a long time, she didn’t force Lei into doing anything she didn’t want to. And like Kae said, it wasn’t INSTA-LOVE, also I don’t know if I’d classify this as YA? More like New Adult, since it does deal with mature subjects like assault. Also god, every time Lei was like “Wren looked ravishing, and it made me feel a type of way… I wonder why…” I wanted to throw my book, she was clearly infatuated but refused to acknowledge her feelings.

Kae: “NA.” That should be a genre. New Adult. That’d work really well. YA shouldn’t even be “YA”. It should be like, not “YA”. ANYWAY. UNRELATED. Yes. Lei had a BIG OL CRUSH. Like, GIRL. YOU LIKE HER. MAKE A MOOOVE. And then… Wren made the move. UGH POETIC CINEMA. Or... Poetic literature.

Geena: Overall, Natasha wrote a really sweet wlw pairing, and it was refreshing to read… Especially the fact that it was well written AND the main pairing, and not just a jab at “diversity” a lot of books tend to do. 10/10 Romance.

Worldbuilding

Geena: Time to dive into that furry shit. First off, the author takes inspiration from her Malaysian roots, which is cool and all but GODDAMN there was some furry shit going on. She did explain the class separations and overall history really well, right?

Kae: I 100% agree with you on the furry shit and how well everything is explained and written. So basically, we have the Moon Caste (the full on furries/demons) which are the ruling/upper caste. The Steele caste (humans who have partial animal/demons qualities) aka the middle class. Then last but not least (well, absolutely the least in their case), the paper caste who are humans with no special qualities. Except Lei, who has literal golden eyes.

Geena: Natasha did a really good job on simplifying the differences between the castes and the history that led to their current states. BUT I wasn’t sure of how her magic system worked? Like can only furries be shaman, how do people become shamans? Are they born with it, or is it Maybelline. ANOTHER THING, it was kind of hard to visualize the demons she described, only because my lizard brain always thought of the animals from Kung Fu Panda. Though one thing that threw me for a loop was the fact that Natasha chose to have a Bull-Form demon as the king, because 99% of the time Lions are used to represent rulers (It was cool ngl). What wasn’t cool was when Lei called the king handsome.

Kae: GEENA I CACKLED. But yes! Kind of freaked me out that she thought he was a cutie. Also was super interesting to not have the king be a lion. But I guess she was going for something different? It definitely works! Natasha also elaborated on the uh- *ahem* way that they’re all built the same when it comes to certain parts which made me think and I didn’t like my thoughts! First thought: HOW? Second thought: OUCH! Third thought: Size LMAO! But give it up to Natasha for explaining that in the simplest way possible without making me have any more than those three thoughts. Either way, moving on, did we explain that Wren, Lei, and these other girls are his concubines? I think we missed that. Surprise…? The Bull King also goes on to explain how he doesn’t have his own name. I also got a hint of him being a little… off. Off as in kind of crazy. Eh?

Geena: RIGHT I FORGOT that by the end the so-called ‘handsome’ Bull King goes batshit crazy, and I’m wondering if this was the product of the Sickness (which isn’t really discussed) or him being mad that he’s shooting dust and has no kids. Also, thank you for Natasha for constantly reminding us that he was jacked. BUT ANYWAYS.

The Bad:

Characters that DIED for NOTHING

Geena: Kenzo and Zelle were two different characters that provided both Wren and Lei with support as they all conspired to be free from the King. Kenzo (Wolf demon) being the King’s advisor and Wren’s training partner, and Zelle lowkey Lei’s confidant (who was also a prostitute). BOTH were passionate and the part of the same cause: Get rid of the King and liberate themselves. But then THEY DIE… FOR WHAT? For that BITCH to still be ALIVE?

Kae: Kenzo and Zelle. Both very likeable characters and both a little sketchy at the start. Just a little. But yes, as Geena stated, they totes died for nothing and it was such a huge let down to see them fall. Especially Kenzo (at least for me), because I thought he had a chance. In the end, he didn’t make it. You know who SHOULD’VE got murked in the end? Blue’s little annoying ass.

Geena: I LOVED KENZO. I have this bad habit of getting attached to side characters the inevitably don’t play a big role. It would’ve been cool to see his motivations behind getting rid of the King. Zelle, who was paper caste, had made her motivations clear. But Kenzo? Also, Lei and Wren essentially lost, as Natasha described it, a ‘brotherly’ figure. FOR WHA?. 0/10 character deaths that made sense. Blue should’ve eaten shit for ratting out Lei/Wren.

Kae: EAT SHIT BLUE.

The Ugly:

The Demon King

Kae: Alrighty. The Demon King aka little BITCH. The Demon King presents himself as somewhat of a decent bull-man at first. He is described as handsome and like Geena said earlier, freakin’ ripped. Suspicion of him not being too good of a dude came to me after he had finished with one of the girls. She came back bruised and beaten and shooketh. Didn’t like that. I assume these girls are a lot smaller than him so I expected him to be… gentler? At least considerate. But, that was just a glimpse. When Lei is finally summoned, she decides that she absolutely does NOT want the Bull-King D and fights the guy off of her. He doesn’t like that… at all. He’s up in arms and ready to fight because he has been denied something he wants. Lei is sent to what’s basically solitary confinement for a week with no food. But she does get a special visitor who brings her food and potential cuddles. The King doesn’t summon Lei for quite some time after that and when he finally does, he takes what he was denied from the start. The scene, thank goodness, is not described. But the after-thats what sucks. Lei is beaten and battered and bruised and has to be carried to her rooms. It’s horrible and I couldn’t imagine how that must’ve been. Especially since he’s a literal animal humanoid. Blegh.

Geena: KAE SUMMED IT UP SO WELL. The king, who has no name and honestly he doesn’t deserve one, is the embodiment of an entitled piece of shit that deserves to be made into ROCKY MOUNTAIN OYSTERS. The scenes that we get a glimpse of including him and the girls is scarring, he does NOT know the meaning of consent and it’s obvious the way he wrecks Lei that he doesn’t care. That made me unbelievably uncomfortable and like you said, I’m so glad that we weren’t subjected to a description of that. In addition, the King was also manipulative as fuck? The way he made Aoki (another concubine, and Lei’s friend) fall in love with him *cough* Stockholm syndrome *cough*. We hate his guts, and he should’ve choked on his blood but :/ I guess the fact that we hate him with such a passion is a good indication that he’s a well-written villain. How the hell he only have like 4 scenes but those 4 scenes just emitted the WORST VIBES. The moment lei said he was handsome and jacked I knew this bitch was going to fuck shit up (a handsome bull demon…. Like really,,, if we’re leaning into that furry shit the only handsome demons are tiger and wolf demons).

Conclusion

Kae: ALRIGHTY Y’ALL. So this concludes our thoughts of Girls of Paper and Fire. I give it a 9/10. I really enjoyed it and it was a good read. The story was very well written as were the characters. I hope we get to see a little more of the magic of this world in the next book. I look forward to what more Natasha has to tell.

Geena: I’d give it an 8.5/10, the 0.5 less comes from the fact that the bitchass king survived at the end. Personally, he could’ve died and there could’ve still been another book BUT I DIGRESS. AND I AGREE, it’s a well-written story with likeable characters, and I’m curious to see how Natasha tackles the mystery behind Lei’s golden eyes in the upcoming books.

#Girls of Paper and Fire #Natasha Ngan #booklr #book review #Lei Zhi #bookworm #Bookblr

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fullregalia · 5 years ago

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chef’s kiss (from daddy).

Like a sad sack Kendall jonesing for something better than park coke, I am already missing the presence of Succession in my life and so blogging and discovering the Vanity Fair podcast will have to stave off my season finale withdrawal. Upon listening to Slate Money’s Succession podcast season finale episode with guest Tamar Adler, I felt like I wanted to think more about the role of food in the show in general. “Thank you for the chicken” may just be the most iconic Tom Wambsgans line Succession has had so far, and there are so many (uncut) gems to choose from (“Just checking the till here, Mark, and it seems you're short a few million,” and who could forget this poetry: “king of edible leaves--his majesty, the spinach.”) The way the show traffics in excess, while also showing us how the Roys eat, but are never truly nourished, is a fascinating lens through which to see how these characters live. [Ed. note: I started writing this all the way back in October, and got sidetracked with school--in the interim, Eater published a great article ranking the dinner scenes in the show.]

If you were to ask me what the stand out food scene in season one is, I’d immediately answer Tom and Greg’s dinner with the ortolan course. It’s such a nouveau riche flex (but maybe it’s an old money flex too? I don’t hang out with ortolan eaters of any socioeconomic status!) and a silly one at that, but it’s fitting that Tom and Greg--of “you can’t make a Tomlette without breaking some Greggs” fame--are the ones to make a big deal over an elaborate dinner, because they’re the outsiders. While many of the show’s episodes are centered on a grand meal as set piece, it shows how commonplace formal, catered dinners are for the Roys. When you’re a billionaire, going out to dinner is probably more of a nuisance if you could just eat something decadent prepared for you in your own home.

By season two, it’s almost as if every episode plays some sort of food-as-metaphor role as the grand meals function as plot points more frequently. From episode one, “Summer Palace,” we start off with Logan trashing an entire seafood feast to order a bunch of pizzas (that don’t even get touched) at their Hamptons house. To the Roys, this kind of waste doesn’t upset anyone, and what’s even more interesting is Logan is totally fine with the idea of ordering pizzas. This weird highbrow/lowbrow liminal space that the Roys occupy is so fascinating to me. Billionaires are out of touch and weird, sure, but they act so artificially chummy, like the way Nan Pierce presents herself, for instance. While rationally I understand Logan demanding that his staff order a bunch of pizzas, I also cannot imagine a billionaire being like, “order a bunch of pizza instead of this lobster!!” (Clearly this is a bit of shades of Warren Buffet garbage palate happening here, billionaires: they’re just like us! #wealthtax.)

But Logan is in no mood to waste neither food nor time in episode three, when they all go hunting and we are introduced to the world’s most insane Exterminating Angel cosplay also known as Boar! On! The! Floor! (!!!) No sausage gets left behind as this dinner party devolves into yet another opportunity for Logan to humiliate and belittle his family and colleagues. As Troy Patterson notes of Logan Roy, he’s carnivorous in every way. Lest you forget, though, the Roys love their beverages more than they appreciate food, and in this episode Connor introduces us to hyperdecanting and Logan views Roman out of touch with the common man because he can’t say how much a gallon of milk costs. Another highbrow/lowbrow moment: this season has made the clash of Logan’s upbringing with his children’s lifelong privilege much more of a thematic presence. (Do we think Shiv has ever ordered pizza delivery? She has worked on political campaigns, but strikes me as a “no thanks, I don’t have time for lunch” kind of staffer.)

Food waste runs in the Roy family, it seems. There’s this funny little moment when Roman goes to management training, picks up a sad looking danish, takes a bite, is disgusted, and puts it back. Oh Romulus, you are such a jerk, but I love your weird ways. One of the things I noticed this season about Roman on his “leadership journey” was that he seemed to teetotal more and more--perhaps as a result of witnessing his brother’s substance abuse issues--it seems as though as he becomes increasingly serious about taking over the job of CEO, he’s been drinking more Perrier and green juice.

As the season continues, the meals keep coming: when the Roys dine with the Pierces at Tern Haven, Nan has this bizarre moment of performative hostess mode when she presents a roast her housekeeper made to the guests as her own? It was such a weird scene, and so telling of who Nan Pierce is: she loves to appear as a homespun, generous person, but clearly is not just a “simple billionaire” who gets her hands dirty in the kitchen. The façades continue to crumble as the evening goes on as the Roys snap at one another, though somehow the disastrous dinner isn’t enough to halt the deal from happening (yet). It takes a weekend in Argestes, with lunches not eaten and dinners walked out on, for that deal to fall apart.

While the big set pieces of season two’s grand dinners reveal to us the cruel and illusory tendencies of our characters, the most revealing--and effective--use of food (or lack thereof) was Shiv and Roman’s visit to their mother in “Return.” We know that the younger Roys’ mother is cold, but in this episode we see just how withholding she is. Before we get to Lady Caroline’s, Roman makes a joke about eating muddy trout and filling up on mustard; on the plus side, we have a funny scene at a convenience store with Roman and Shiv looking completely confused by how normal people snack. It’s clear that Caroline does not have a healthy relationship with food--Harriet Walter says that was part of her backstory for the character--and she serves them pigeon with shot and feather not cleaned off. She cannot nourish her children, literally or emotionally. (lol at my *extremely incisive* commentary and psychoanalysis.) Later in the evening, while talking to Kendall in the kitchen, she cannot bring herself to have a heart-to-heart with him. In the New York Times’ review of the episode, Noel Murray says: “That’s one powerful symbol for life as a Roy. One parent hollers for protein. The other serves inedible meat.” These rich kids just can’t catch a break from their parental nightmares!

Succession shows its characters’ damage through their total lack of intimacy or vulnerability. It is not your usual HBO show with gratuitous nudity; besides Roman and Gerri’s .... situation, there’s not really sex on this show. The only way that the Roys derive pleasure is from money and the flashy status symbols that come with it (hello, mega yacht!). The scenes with food become the most emotional because it’s the closest they get to physical or emotional closeness in many ways. But the Roys don’t do emotional closeness; I think one of the cruelest--and funniest--examples of this is when Shiv, Tom, Roman, and Tabitha have dinner together and all Shiv and Roman can do is dunk on Tom for his bad suits (Roman: “You look like a divorce attorney from the Twin Cities,” and: “I’m sorry but like, what the fuck? You look like a Transformer. What’s wrong with your body, man?”).

All this brings me to the denouement of Season 2, in which we also reach the apex of Tom’s frustration with his terrible in-laws mistreatment of him, and the aforementioned “thank you for the chicken” line. First: Logan Roy is out here on a MEGA YACHT eating a chicken wing with some big Ricky Rozay wingstop energy. Second: Tom cannot bring himself to confront Logan, even if he finally vented his frustrations to Shiv; all he can do is stuff his face (it’s not love, Tom!! I learned the hard way!!!) and walk away. Third: all the yacht meal scenes are great--just a complete pile-on of courtiers backstabbing and badmouthing each other (Tom calling Karl a “sausage thief”) with a few genuine moments of emotional honesty. Connor drinks wine at breakfast. Greg, accustomed to quaffing rosé, fears he will be sprinkles on the sundae of a Tom sacrifice. Roman defends Gerri! The look Roman and Kendall exchange when the sacrifice is made. Roman, who is “widely known as a terrible person,” in general becoming the MVP of the latter half of the season, even asks to talk to his siblings “normally.” A request that they summarily mock him for. Succession season finales have major “Water, water, every where / Nor any drop to drink” vibes.

We end the season with Kendall giving daddy Roy a (Judas) kiss after a figurative last supper on the boat, and what’s next is ripe for further scenes of familial drama. Let’s hope there’s similarly rich protein for us in Season 3, I’m already hungry for more.

#succession #food #lol #tv #demi you genius #kiss from daddy

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dawnblxde · 6 years ago

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[Kingdom Hearts 3 Review]

Welp I’ve finally done it, finally played and finished KH3! - After intentionally delaying doing so with my day one copy after finding out for some silly reason - it lacked multiple world visits for development sake and had no Final Fantasy characters - so I decided to finish the games I was in the middle of then replay the entire KH franchise, except the ones you could watch. Gonna leave my thoughts below. Just in case there are those out there still trying to avoid legit spoilers!

There were good and bad elements to this game.. Plenty of my experience that I enjoyed, but I believe more so that I didn’t - which made me want to pull out my hair. But I like my head shaved, so that wouldn’t work lol I liked the graphics, beautiful but I knew a PS3 could handle them as the quality of Woody in this game was the same as him in Toy Story 3 (2010 Video Game). Enjoyed the gameplay, though it felt like a flawed, floaty and broken version of Kingdom Heart’s 2 near perfect improvement of Kingdom Heart’s gameplay. A problem was the fact that in the first two main games, even when I was level 50-60′s - I always felt like I could DIE. It was always a fear during major combat moments. I had to concentrate so much just to be successful. Even if I tried to be a higher level then recommending through grinding. I never felt like that in KH3, every moment was such a cake walk. Even the final battle. Did they even try. Regardless, I had a good time with the gameplay and the visuals. But I wasn’t as drawn in as previous games. It did the game no favors and was a massive flaw, it lacking Final Fantasy characters. We should of been able to explore Radiant Garden or had other worlds relevant to FF characters. They were really important to Sora’s development as a Keyblade wielder. Cloud and Squall for sure. Sora wouldn’t be who he is if he hadn’t encountered and spoke to them. They’d of been useful in multiple sequences. We deserved the next part to Cloud’s issues with Sephiroth. That wasn’t resolved. See how Squall/Leon and the others reacted and dealt with what was going on at Radiant Garden. They’re capable of other world travel, seeing how they’d react to some of the new worlds would of been great as well. Nomura confirmed the only Noctis he’d put in KH was his Noctis. Versus XIII Noctis. And interest in doing so. Yet he wasn’t in the game, when as an Anti-Hero of both light and darkness would of been interesting. Seeing he’d take neither side. Also has important factors in common with Rapunzel and Elsa. Seeing them relating over this would of been nice. The lack off FF adds to factors that make KH3 be disappointing experience - along with an enjoyable one. One of the things that still makes KH2 the best. Was how awesome it was to watch the Final Fantasy characters and Disney characters team up in the battle of 1000 Heartless. One of the best aspects about the franchise is the concept of it being a FF x Disney - a Final Fantasy and Disney collaboration. Multiple visits were really needed. Some of the worlds were quite enjoyable and not frustrating. But they all have different percentages of feeling rushed and not fleshed out enough due to one visit. And some annoyingly treated Sora like he didn’t matter. Just acted like making you watch rushed unfinished version’s of the original Disney movies. Sora’s just there like. Oh look, it’s Sora over there! Hi Sora! You don’t matter here! Shouldn’t be like that. The Disney characters should be well blended into the Kingdom Hearts plot and Sora in the plot of the Disney world. The story made me feel emotional, I enjoyed all the Kingdom Hearts parts, even if I felt some of them were rushed or not written well. Tears did leave my eyes. I liked how Aqua didn’t actually give into Darkness, it was Ansem’s fault. I liked the reunion, final battle sequences and all the stuff leading up to it. My favorite parts to praise are the deaths of all Org 13 members, each made me feel emotional and I wanted to see those character’s again reborn. Not so much young Xeraxnort. But Ansem and Xemnas? Oh the feels there, they were strong. I clapped. I felt there could be more with Larxene in the game in general, including her end. Luxord’s! Clap, really want him to come back and play cards with Sora. Riku Replica’s was great too. Both Riku Replica’s. Marluxa’s.. Vanitas’s was disappointing. However, these great moments aren’t enough for me to forgive those disrespected by this game. The one’s from the worlds you could visit. I’ll get to the unforgivable bits last. Toy Story’s new story and world were great. I loved exploring that world and playing through it. The development was great. Only flaw was what they did with Buzz, he’s stronger character then they take him for. He wouldn’t lose himself to the Darkness. Otherwise, everything was great. Pretty sure it’s my favorite. Hercules’s world was the level of quality I expected! It was decent, I miss the goddamn tournament's, Phil’s voice - but I did love the exploration of his city and meeting his father! Shame no boss fight with Hades's, they’re great and fun! Twilight Town sucked! I liked seeing the gang again, Uncle Scrooge and little chef. But that doesn’t make up for the fact that more then half of Twilight Town is cut and it doesn’t look like the same place! I liked exploring the entire world, not just a portion of it. Monsters Inc’s sequel to the first film with that world experience was great! I had a blast! I always wanted to see Sully’s reunion with Boo! It wasn’t perfect, but I had a good time! Pirates of Caribbean felt like it changed things from it’s canon, but it was an emotional blast! Jack Sparrow scenes and Will scenes, it was just great! The Big Hero 6 world! Oh it was great! It was emotional to lost Baymax in the film, to get him back was great! Kinda sucked to not see the big brother come back, but they’re saving that version of events for the sequel. Two Baymax’s. The only thing I didn’t like was how the whole cast was shrunk. Best example being Honey should of been taller then Jack Sparrow’s model, but she wasn’t. These worlds could of really done with multiple visits. Even more so the three left, that were wronged and disrespected. Don’t try to praise/defend what was done to them, they deserved better. Winne the Pooh deserved better. I liked not having to collect Torn Pages, but even if you didn’t have to. In the previous games, The Winnie the Pooh worlds lasted about an hour or so doing all the activities, helping out all Pooh Bear’s friends - stuff like that. Then you have KH3′s version, which is less then 20 minutes, doing the same activity three times. That was awful. Pooh’s universe deserved better. We deserved better. This is a massive flaw. Can’t forgive this. I love Pooh Bear. Now, as someone who love’s Rapunzel, not fond of how they treated her world either. It was basically the movie with bits cut out and skipped. She hardly interacted with Kingdom Hearts lore, Sora hardly stuck around her. It was just like. Now and then, Sora’s there. Why were they so scared of showing Rapunzel kissing Flynn? There were so many moments Sora should of got to interact with? Where were the two bad guy twins? Rapunzel just generally deserved better in this game. Last but not least, Frozen. Probably the worst world in the game. Because you spend most of it just falling off mountains. They hardly let Sora interact with Elsa or Anna. Or left them get involved in Kingdom Hearts lore. Sora would of been able to relate well to Elsa if they let it happen. You can’t explore the palace, Han’s has no lines and you’re forced to listen to Let It Go again with Sora basically just there. Like hi Sora! All I liked was Snow guard getting more of a role. Don’t even get to explore the city. Just the snowy place. No real development, it’s like - what was the point? There really was none. Why did we go there? Why was Larxene there? Elsa and Anna deserved better then this. Also while not all Disney worlds could of returned in KH3, due to their stories being settled. A lot definitely could! Also, Kairi deserved better then pretty much being a plot device, hardly getting development at all just to go poof. And the idea that Sora’s sacrifice to get her back doesn’t lead to the priority of everyone to find and/or bring him back somehow instead of chilling. Just made the whole ending sequence an OOC moment for me.

Verdict!

Kingdom Hearts 3 is a decent game and fun experience, but it’s also a flawed mess. Like handling in a English report that gets a low C and just barely hits the passing grade. It is not the worst in the franchise, but Kingdom Hearts 2 easily beats it and so does Kingdom Hearts, the original one. Funner to play then Dream Drop Distance, Chain Of Memories, Recoded and the Roxas focused game! But the rest defeat it! I have no interest in a new game plus, roleplay wise I intend to amend the flaws. The Disney worlds that were wronged will get justice. Add back Final Fantasy and the missing Disney worlds. Make it what it should of been! I had a good time, I really did. But once was enough. After finishing, it now shocks me that an amount of people I can count on just one of my hands tried to either tell me KH3 was good enough or superior to all the other games, even KH2. My assumption now is, they hadn’t recently played the other games before playing 3, were lost in Nostagla or something else was going on. Just how.. How could this possibly beat the two other main titles? The only thing superior is the more then three team mates tbh. xD

7/10

I really feel like I’m being generous here, but if I went lower then I’d think I was being too harsh. It’s not FFXV and Bound by Flame 5/10 quality, but it’s certainly not The Walking Dead (by Tellale) and The Last of Us 9/10 quality. So this will have to do. Nomura, I strongly advise you to look back at Kingdom Hearts 2 and what made it so great, before you work on your next main title.

#ooc #jesus it took me ages to write this

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fluffy-marshmallow-heart · 6 years ago

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Drake's Diary ch.13 - The Beaumont Bash

Words: 4231

It's the day after Drake and Emma's monumental kiss, and it's time for the last party of the season! What truths will emerge tonight?

Drake walked into the Beaumont estate, still frazzled from the previous night. He hadn’t slept a wink after kissing Emma and replayed the scene over and over in his head. How did he let himself lose control like that? And then instead of talking about it, he just left without saying goodbye to anyone. And when he ran into Liam and discovered they were going on a date…that weighed on him heavily. He knew he must look absolutely exhausted, but this was the last event of the social season, and he needed to be here. But really, he just wanted to run away and never look back.

As more guests arrive, servers distribute drinks and appetizers, and he grabs a glass of champagne. Definitely going to need some alcohol to get through this.

As he wandered around, his eyes found Emma’s in the sea of streaming guests. Unable to stop himself, he went right over to her.

“Welcome to Beaumont Bash…you’ll recognize some of these fine floral arrangements as yours…” She told him, her face straight and not showing any emotion.

She looks absolutely beautiful…just like a princess…a blue gown, gold trimming…wow

“Rose…You look…”

“Yes?”

He cleared his throat “…Ready for the party. Everything here really came together.”

“I know, right? Though…you don’t look like you’re dressed for the occasion.” She said, frowning.

“You don’t like my look? This shirt’s clean.”

She scoffed “I guess that’s the most I should expect. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you dress up for one of these fancy events. It might be a nice change of pace for you, getting out of your comfort zone.”

Ouch. That’s the first time that comment had any sting to it.

He shrugged “Eh. Fashion is subjective. Besides, people are here to see the Prince, not me.”

Emma shakes her head and Drake barely caught the words she was muttering to herself.

“Guess I don’t count as wanting to see you.”

His breath caught, and he couldn’t believe what he’d heard. She went on a date with Liam. She can’t be serious. Should I ask her about it? Should I apologize? Maybe I should have made more of an effort…

Before he could decide, Hana bounces over to them.

"Emma! Maxwell! I’ve never been to the Beaumont estate before. This looks wonderful.”

“Thank you, Hana…” Maxwell said

“And Emma! You look amazing!” She exclaimed

Drake sighed. She really does. Damn it. I should have at least worn a different shirt.

Emma smiled “Thank you. As always, you look lovely too”

A server comes near the group, handing out the caviar and paprika appetizers.

“Our creations!” Maxwell squealed

“I hope people like them…” Emma said nervously

Drake overheard Kiara from the next table “Uhh…What is this dish?”

Maxwell leans over to Kiara’s table. “What you have there is a deconstructed delicacy of caviar cultivated from pampered hake fish of the Swedish fjords with paprika harvested from a micro-nursery in Provence.”

The ladies take delicate bites of the appetizers

Penelope smiled “Wow…so fancy…I like them! Spicy, salty, definitely unique.”

Kiara agreed “Mmmm…It reminds me of when I dined at the top of la tour Eiffel in Paris! Did you use the same chef?”

“Someone comparable.” Maxwell told her before turning back to Emma. “Well, the reactions to our appetizers seem mostly positive.”

Emma snorted “They like the food? Really? I can’t believe we pulled that off!”

“Yeah. I really thought this would be a complete disaster.” Drake told them. He could feel Emma glaring at him and there was no way he was going to look at her just now.

“I told you…it’s all in the marketing!” Maxwell clapped him on the shoulder, oblivious to the tension.

Emma gave a small smile at that, but it fades as Lady Madeleine and Lady Olivia enter together.

“Duchess Olivia…Countess Madeleine…Welcome” She greeted.

Madeleine looked her up and down. “Lady Emma. Don’t you look…well…nice. And the Beaumont’s have certainly outdone themselves”

Olivia smirked “Yes, this isn’t as tacky an affair as I’d imagined it would be.”

Emma narrowed her eyes. “I’ll take that as a compliment.”

“As you should, Now, let’s get this evening over with…where’s the wine?”

Olivia brushes past, but Madeleine lingers. She looks at Prince Liam sitting at his table up front before turning back to Emma.

“You must be feeling pretty smug”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about…” Emma started, before Madeleine interrupted her.

“I’ve been hearing some rumors that you’ve become a frontrunner going into the coronation.”

“Madeleine, it’s not a race.” Emma sighed.

“Isn’t it though? In a way?”

“No. It’s about the Prince and who he wants to marry.”

Come on, Rose. You know he wants to marry you. Of course, you don’t think it’s a race. You already won.

Madeleine rose an eyebrow “…Right. You may have the upper hand while we’re at the Beaumont estate, but that doesn’t mean you’ll be chosen as queen. You never know what might happen…”

Shaking her head, Emma just replied “Madeleine, may the best woman win.”

“Yes. The Best woman.”

As Madeleine walks away, Bertrand stands up on the dais to address the attendees. “Welcome, everyone. If you’ll please take your seats, dinner will begin shortly.

“That’s my cue. I have a seat in the back, so I’ll see you after dinner.” Drake said, eyeing Emma.

“And I better go and take my seat with the other ladies.” Hana told them.

“I wish we could have all sat together.” Emma said sadly.

You were in charge of the seating chart. You could have made that happen…Although…Bertrand wouldn’t have allowed it either. Maybe she did try. I’m such a jerk.

Drake spoke again. “Hey, don’t look so disappointed, Rose. You’re sitting with royalty. I learned a long time ago I don’t fit in there. But don’t worry. I’m sure you’ll be able to handle one dinner without us.”

“Right…” She said glumly.

Drake, Emma, and Maxwell all went their separate ways and Drake couldn’t help but feel disappointed. He had started getting used to sitting with them, and it was much more enjoyable than sitting by himself. Get it together, Walker. It’s been this way your whole life. Forever sitting alone.

He watched as Emma takes her seat at the head table, Liam sitting on her left, Bertrand on her right. As the King and Queen are seated beside the Prince, servers come out bearing the main course. Everyone looks happy, and Drake started eating his own food. At least his meal was hot.

After dinner, Bertrand had everyone gather in the Grand Hall as he walks halfway up the staircase and started a speech. “Citizens, nobles, friends, we’ve gathered here today to celebrate the end of the social season. So, if you’ll hear me out, I’d like to share a few words…”

As soon as he started talking, Drake saw Emma and Maxwell disappear. He frowned. What’s that about? Shouldn’t they be right there with him?

After a few moments, they come back, Emma with a dagger and Maxwell with a flail

Oh no. Maxwell has a weapon. This never ends well.

“…and so, with all of House Beaumont with me, let’s propose a toast!” Bertrand announced.

Maxwell and Emma go up the stairs, weapons and champagne bottles in hand.

“To our gracious royal family…”

“To all those here tonight!” Maxwell interrupted

“And to the Brothers Beaumont! Our legendary hosts, who I wouldn’t be here without.” Emma grinned

“Let’s rock this place to the ground!” Maxwell finished.

Maxwell swings the flail into a champagne bottle, shattering it entirely. Champagne runs down the steps.

Drake could barely watch as it was Emma’s turn. But thankfully, she swings at the bottle, slicing the top clean off. Champagne foams out, dripping onto the stairs.

Maxwell looks impressed, and Drake definitely was. She certainly had style.

Bertrand grabbed a glass. “From all of us at House Beaumont…thank you!”

Everyone cheers as the servers’ rush forward to hand out glasses of champagne to everyone.

Drake meandered around again, unsure of what to do. He felt like a fish out of water. He didn’t belong here, and he wanted to leave. Bertrand picks up an open bottle of champagne and takes a big swig. Music blasts from the sound system, and Maxwell slides down the railing. From the doorways leading into the room, professional dancers and acrobats stream in.

“I hope you’re ready. Cuz the Maxwell special is in the house!” Maxwell moonwalks onto the middle of the floor to the music’s increasing tempo. “I am the myth…the man…the legend. Witness me!” He drops into a flurry of breakdance moves. Drake moves to join Emma, Liam, and Hana.

“It’s been less than two minutes, and my ears hurt…” Drake complained

“Come on, Drake, you usually give it at least five minutes before tapping out.” Liam laughed.

“There’s so much happening!” Hana exclaimed

“That’s the problem.” Drake muttered. He thought it couldn’t get worse but then…

“Bring out the horses!” Bertrand shouted

“The horses!? You’re bringing horses in here??” Emma gasped, as someone on the staff leads out a couple beautiful steeds.

“Who’s ready for a little horse riding?”

“I am!” Maxwell announced, running forward and mounting a horse.

“Great…” Drake frowned. This really can only end badly.

“Who joins me?” He calls out. “The Prince?”

Liam shook his head, still grinning. “I nominate Drake as my proxy

“Oh, no. you’re not forcing me into the saddle tonight” Drake glared at him.

“I vote for Emma!” Hana said excitedly

“I believe I have my own horse, thank you very much.” Emma told her.

“One that made the trip with me from the palace…” Liam told her softly. Emma looked at him in surprise as a joyful smile broke out on her face. A 3rd horse arrives, the one Emma had named Chica Linda. Emma mounts. “Hey girl, I missed you.”

She rides around the room with Maxwell, waving to party goers “My fellow Cordonians…Today, I ride for Cordonia!”

“For Cordonia!” Hana joined in.

“Woo, riding a horse. Yay.” Drake grimaced, still afraid something terrible was about to happen.

Maxwell nudges Emma, and they get off the horses, giving someone else the reigns. Drake breathed a sigh of relief. At least nothing bad happened to Emma. I mean Maxwell. At least nothing bad happened to Maxwell.

Liam approaches Emma and taps her shoulder. Before he has a chance to say what he wanted, Olivia cut in

“Liam, there you are! Don’t forget you promised me a drink…”

Liam smiles apologetically at Emma and bids her farewell. He kisses her on the cheek and whispers something in her ear.

Ugh why do I do this to myself? Why can’t I stop watching her? Especially when she’s with Liam. It feels so…awful.

The party rages into the night…and then later…

Fragments of split apples litter the floor. The bust of Maxwell’s great grandfather is riddled with cracks and chips, an arrow protrudes from his eye, while the apple on his head remains unscathed. Kiara lies in the corner of the room, while Penelope drapes her arms around a horse. Bertrand sits against a column, a sword in one hand and an empty bottle of champagne in the other, talking to himself and smiling.

In the middle of the carnage, Maxwell continues to dance. “Break it down. Nice and slow.”

“You’re still going?” Emma asks wearily.

He shrugged “If I stop, the party stops. It’s like that Louis the 14th quote. I am the party. How’re you feeling? I hope it wasn’t too hard on you.”

“I feel so-so. A party that rocks you to your core also drains you to your core.”

“Truer words have rarely been spoken.” Maxwell agreed.

Drake looked around. “It’s over. I’m officially free.”

Maxwell’s mouth fell open. “What do you mean it’s over? The party is just getting started.”

Drake’s eyebrows shot up. “Lady Penelope is literally talking to a horse. The party has done its job.”

Emma giggled. “Back home, this was always about the time we’d break out a game of truth or dare, but I bet you guys are too classy for that.”

“You’d be betting wrong! I love truth or dare.” Maxwell exclaimed.

Hana’s eyebrows furrowed. “Truth or dare? That sounds dangerous…”

Emma looked at her slyly. “Well…only if you have something to hide…or a fear of embarrassing stunts…”

“It sounds…fun!” Hana mused, breaking into a smile.

Emma laughed. “I can’t believe you’ve never played! Now we’ve got to do it.”

Drake grimaced. “Oh no. I’m not playing truth or dare.”

“Come on, Drake, there’s nothing to be afraid of.” Emma winked at him

“Do it, do it!” Maxwell started

“I see where this is going…”

“Drake Drake Drake!” Maxwell chanted.

“Ugh okay…fine. I’ll play, just stop chanting my name.”

Always chanting my fucking name to get me to do something I don’t want to.

“Whoohoo! Someone’s going streaking tonight!” Maxwell hollered.

“We can play in my room” Hana suggested, and the 4 friends headed up the stairs.

“This is so exciting! How do we start?” Hana asked, excitedly.

“Heh. Usually with a few drinks” Drake told her. Let’s definitely get more alcohol going for this.

Hana nodded “Oooh there’s a full bar! What do you guys want?”

Maxwell thought a moment. “Make me something fruity and delicious. I know! I want Sex on the Beach!”

Hana’s jaw dropped. “Oh my! I don’t think…”

“It’s a drink…Never mind, I’ll make it myself.” Maxwell walked over to the bar and Drake smothered a laugh. She is so clueless.

“I’ll just have…”

“Let me guess. Whiskey.” Emma said.

“I’m getting predictable, aren’t I?” Drake admitted.

She smirked “Maybe just a little bit.”

“What about you, Emma?” Hana asked.

“Sex on the beach sounds amazing right now.” Emma replied, not even looking in Hana’s direction. Instead, she had locked eyes with Drake, and he didn’t miss that undertone in her voice.

He swallowed, hard. She did that on purpose.

Hana pours herself champagne “Cheers, Friends! Thank you for joining me tonight!”

Drake rose his glass, still looking at Emma. “Cheers.”

“To friendship!” Maxwell toasted.

“To friendship! And Truth or dare!” Emma said

Drake grimaced. These people sure are excited. “Oh boy, this is going to be a long night.”

“Drinks have been accomplished. Now, what comes next?” Hana asked.

“Someone goes first.” Maxwell replied.

“Rose should start. This was her idea.”

Maxwell nodded. “Okay, Emma…truth or dare?”

“I choose truth.”

“I was hoping you’d say that. I’ve got a great one for you. If you were stranded on a deserted island, where you’ll never see anyone or any civilization ever again…which one of us would you want with you?”

“I’d want Drake.”

Drake snapped his attention back to her. “Me?”

Oh, come ooonnnnn “Be honest, Rose, you just want me there so I’m suffering as much as you are.”

She grinned “Mostly just to see how you’d look in a grass skirt.”

“Hey!” Drake laughed.

“Just kidding. I think you’d be gruff and grumpy, but deep down, when it counts, you’d probably save me from a tiger attack or something.”

“Well. I’d feel terrible if a tiger ate my only companion.”

“And there wouldn’t be any nobles around, or courtly intrigue or gossip…In fact, I think you might enjoy being stranded more than palace life.”

“You never know”

Drake and Emma were both still grinning at each other, leaning towards each other, Drake noticing how her eyes were sparkling, before Maxwell cleared his throat and the moment was over.

“Right! Okay, Maxwell, you’re turn. Truth or Dare?” Emma asked

Once again, she chose me. She always chooses me. I wonder if I will ever be able to do the same?

“Dealer’s choice! I’m not afraid of anything!” Maxwell told her

Emma nodded. “Okay then…Tell us a secret that no one else knows about you.”

“Aw, I’m an open book! Everyone knows everything about me!”

Drake rose an eyebrow. “Nope.”

“Not true at all.” Emma agreed.

“We know almost nothing about you!” Hana joined in.

Maxwell looked between the three of them, confused. “Well, all anyone ever had to do was ask. Okay, let’s see…I hate carousels.”

“Really?” Emma asked incredulously. “I thought everyone loved carousels”

Maxwell shook his head. “When I was little, the royal court took all the kids to a theme park for the Prince’s birthday. But when we were on the carousel, some reporters got in and mobbed us. The security team did their best to get us all out of there, but I was the last one they got to. So, I was stuck on this dumb carousel for what seemed like forever with people taking pictures and shouting questions to me. I was only 3…I had no idea what was really going on. And because our parents had spent so much time trying to warn us about dangers, I thought I was about to get murdered.”

“Aww…Maxwell…”

“I’m fine. It was a long time ago.”

“Still…”

Maxwell laughed. “Geez, this is why I don’t like to talk about serious stuff. I’m fine, you guys! Just forget it! Next up…Hana…truth or dare?”

“Oh…um..truth!”

“Tell us about your first kiss.”

“My first kiss? Well…it was actually a very chaste courtship. Our first kiss was in front of a professional photographer for our engagement photo shoot. My parents were insistent that we publish a very public announcement in all the papers. It was…somewhat awkward.”

“He wasn’t a great kisser?” Emma asked, sympathetically.

“He missed.”

“He…missed? How?” Drake piped in

Hana shrugged. “He kissed my ear. Well, he punctured his lip on my earring, actually. He started bleeding. I felt terrible. My parents were furious that he ruined my dress. It was a complete disaster.”

Emma’s jaw dropped “Hana…You deserved a better first kiss than that!”

Hana smiled. “Thank you, Emma, but it wasn’t so bad. Looking back, it was actually pretty funny. I mean, who can miss that badly on a kiss?”

“Ha! I know what you mean. What a loser…” Maxwell said, not making eye contact with anyone.

“Maxwell…” Drake warned. “It’s called truth or dare for a reason.”

He threw his hands up. “Okay, maybe I accidentally kissed someone’s chin but that’s like, a totally understandable mistake, right? I mean, it’s right below the mouth…”

“Heehee. Yes, that’s completely normal” Hana assured him.

“But there’s all kinds of first kisses, Hana.” Emma said. Everyone looked at her, surprised.

“What?” She asked. “It’s true! When you kiss someone for the first time, it’s like getting that first kiss back.”

“I…don’t understand.” Hana said, eyebrows furrowed.

Emma laughed. “Okay, well. When you meet someone, and hang out, for example. Maybe you even become best friends with that person…”

Oh no. What is she doing? Is she going to tell them??

She continued “The first time you and that person kiss…it can be magical. There’s passion, heat, want, need,…sometimes even love.” She ended in a whisper, eyes downcast.

Drake swallowed and felt his face flush. She wasn’t giving anything about the two of them away, hell, she wasn’t even looking at him, but he might draw attention if he didn’t stop blushing. But as he tended to do around her, he couldn’t stop himself from trying to make her feel better.

“Yes…there is that.” Drake agreed softly. Emma rose her eyes to look into his, and the vulnerability there took his breath away. She had never looked at him like that before. It made him want to run to her and scoop her into his arms.

“This is getting too heavy.” Maxwell announced. “My turn again. Emma, I dare you to go streak through the ballroom in your underwear!”

“That’s not fair! It’s not her turn!” Hana laughed

“Yeah, and she didn’t even choose ‘dare.’” Drake told him.

Maxwell sighed. “Well, someone should streak tonight, or this game is a bust. Come now, Emma, it’s your game. Who will it be?”

And here it comes.

“Drake” She chose

Yup. There it is. Every time.

He shook his head, trying to hide his smile, and the friends make their way to the now empty ballroom

“The things I do for you people.” He grumbled as he removed his clothes. He takes a deep breath and sprints through the room.

“Woo! Go Drake!” Emma shouted

Drake sprints back and stops in front of the three of them. “Satisfied?”

“Yep! Now what?” Maxwell asked.

“I’m going to join in!” Emma exclaimed. She tugs off her clothes. “We can’t make Drake be the only one. Come on, Hana!”

Hmm. A black bra this time. Very nice….dammit, stop staring.

“Okay! It does look fun!” Hana agreed. She pulls off her clothes. “Let’s go!”

“Maxwell?” Emma asked.

“I’ll be the photographer.”

“Maxwell!” She scolded.

“I mean, I’ll stand guard!”

Carrying their clothes, Emma, Drake, and Hana take off running around the ballroom.

“Wooo!” Emma screams

“Freeeeeeedom!” Drake called out, smiling from ear to ear.

“Truth or dare!” Hana shouted.

They race back to Maxwell and back to Hana’s room…where they collapse on the bed, laughing and panting, before they get dressed.

“I can’t believe we just did that!” Hana laughed

Drake nodded “Ah, the magic of truth or dare.”

“This was so much fun tonight! Thank you!”

“Any time” Emma told her.

Maxwell just shrugged. “You know me, I don’t need much of an excuse to party.”

“I’m in…still not sure why I came this time, but I guess I’d do it again.” Drake said.

“Oh my gosh, Drake, I think we’re graduating from friends to best friends!” Hana exclaimed.

Drake held his hands in front of him. “Whoa whoa whoa…Let’s not get ahead of ourselves.”

Maxwell clapped him on the shoulder. “I dunno, man. We all drink together, goof off together, spend most of our time together…”

“No”

Hana hugs Drake’s arm. “It’s too late Drake. We are best friends!”

Drake frowned. “I guess I’m just going to have to accept this, huh?”

Emma smiled. “It’s probably for the best. You could do much worse than the three of us.”

Drake chuckled. “That’s true, isn’t it?” He sighs. “Okay. You got me.”

“Yay!” Maxwell cheered

“Yay!” Hana agreed

“Please tell me this isn’t a thing we do now.” Drake said, looking over at Emma.

“Drake…yay!” Emma exclaimed with a laugh.

“I’m surrounded.” Drake grimaced.

“But in a good way, right?” Maxwell asked.

“I said what I said.” Drake told him

Just then, Hana stifles a massive yawn.

Maxwell nodded at her. “Okay, we should probably call it a night before we break Hana…” Everyone stands up and starts making their goodbyes.

“Goodnight! This has been a very memorable evening!” Hana called

“Good night, guys.” Drake said

“G’night!” Emma grinned

They dispersed in the hallway, and once Maxwell was out of sight Emma turned back to Drake.

“You didn’t say goodbye last night” She accused

“I…you’re right. I’m sorry, Rose.”

Both her eyebrows shot up. “Oh! I wasn’t expecting it to be that easy.”

Drake just shrugged. “I know when I’m in the wrong. Besides, it took most of the party to get you to warm back up to me.”

They started walking down the hall again, and after a brief pause, the question that had been coursing through him the whole day came tumbling out.

“How was your date with Liam?”

Emma stopped walking and turned to look at him again slowly. “How did you know about that?” She asked

“Erm…I…ran into Liam as I was leaving last night.” Drake admitted.

The corners of her mouth turned up slightly and she resumed walking again. Drake walked alongside her, still waiting for an answer. He shuddered. Maybe it went a little too well.

“Well, this is me.” She said, stopping in front of a door and unlocking it.

“Right…” Drake said.

“Drake…if you had actually stuck around another 5 minutes last night, you would know…I didn’t go on a date with Liam.”

“Wh-what? But he said…” Drake started, confused

“You talked to him before he came inside. I told him I was too tired from party prep. I thought Bertrand was going to have a heart attack.” She laughed.

Drake was still just standing there, completely dumbfounded. “Why did you say that?” He asked incredulously.

She just smiled and turned to open her door. Once inside, she turned to close it again.

“Because I’d just had the most magical first kiss of my entire life.” She said softly. “And I wanted to go dream about it as soon as I could.”

Drake’s mouth fell open at her confession. She smirked at him and started closing her door. “Goodnight, Drake.”

The door clicked shut, leaving Drake still standing there in the hallway with his mouth agape.

Did that just happen? What the…what does that…how am I…do I knock and see if she lets me in? No, no, I definitely can’t do that…oh my god, the coronation. The coronation is next, and Liam is going to choose her.

He turned slowly and started shuffling to his room. He’ll ask her to marry him…and no one says no to Liam…although…she said no to the date…Fuck! Now what? I need to make sure she knows how I feel about her. Otherwise…I think I’ll regret it for the rest of my life.

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